Phil is a hipster and will totally clean your house and make it sweet. ” You can rest easy with the fact that a sweet dude in skinny jeans is totally taking out the garbage and cleaning your toilet,” says his rad Craigslist ad. [More]
funny
If I Read The Fine Print I Would Still Have A House
By 3.2.10
Credit card companies stuffed all the crazy they could into their contracts in advance of the CARD act taking effect. This time they might have taken it too far, even for banks. Shoulda read that boilerplate!
#599; The Boilerplate Clause [WonderMark] (Thanks to MercuryPDX!)
Buy A Georgetown Law Degree On Craigslist
By 3.1.10
Mom and Dad always wanted you to be a lawyer but who wants to dump all that money down the tubes and read those boring books? Well, no longer! Some burnout is selling his law degree from a fancy university on Craigslist! [More]
Don't Call In To Complain About How You Can't Steal Wi-Fi
By 3.1.10
Someone named Jennifer called in to the Leo Laporte show a week ago and asked for help on how to get back online. She’d been able to access a Wi-Fi hotspot for over a year and a half from her apartment, but “that’s disappeared now for three weeks.” She bought a wireless extender and that didn’t solve the problem at all. Laporte gently tries to point out that she’s being a freeloader, but she’s not buying it. [More]
Colorado Springs Billboard Company Says "No Puppet Boobs Allowed"
By 2.25.10
Lucy the Slut is one of the puppets in the musical “Avenue Q,” and like the other puppet characters she’s frequently displayed in their advertising. But not in Colorado Springs, Colorado, where a billboard company refused to put up ads showing Lucy’s cleavage. An exec for the billboard company told the local paper, “If I have to explain it to my 4-year-old or my grandmother, we don’t put it up.” Hey four-year-old, it’s a puppet. Hey grandma, those are boobs. Problem solved. [More]
1983 PleaseRobMe, 1977 Foursquare
By 2.23.10
Technology is scary! People will use all these status and twitter and facebook updates to find out when you’re not home and come and steal all your DVDs! At least that was the ballyhoo last week when the site PleaseRobMe launched. Turns out, they were just reinventing the fear wheel. Andy Baio found an article from 1983 that warned consumers that burglars would know by your answering machine picking up that you weren’t home, and one from 1977 that advised against posting funeral notices in the paper, lest robbers make off with the silver while you’re burying grandpa. The more things change, the less they do. [More]
PajamaJeans Help You Pretend You're Wearing Jeans
By 2.18.10
Sometimes you need to leave the house, for instance to go to the supermarket or to attend a job interview, and let’s face it: that’s when the Snuggie fails you. Until they make the formal Snuggie, there’s at least PajamaJeans. They’re like sweatpants, but disguised as jeans. Sadly they’re only for the ladies right now, so guys will have to stick to sweatpants when they give up on life. [More]
The Greatest Craigslist Room Rental Ad Ever
By 2.18.10
Maximize your Craigslist profits by crafting copy that really stands out. Like this guy’s rental listing that begins, “$500 HOLY CRAP! IS THAT A ROOM FOR RENT ON MY CRAIGSLIST??!?!?!?” and continues, “Do you want to be homeless? Then you better come check this room for rent out. It has WALLS and a CEILING. BLOCKS THE F****** WIND AND RAIN FOOL!” [More]
Don't Tweet The Identity Of Your Plane's Air Marshal
By 2.17.10
On a flight yesterday, minor celebrity Kim Kardashian figured out that the guy next to her was the air marshal, at which point she excitedly announced it to her followers on Twitter. “Jim the air marshall makes me feel safe!” she tweeted. But it’s okay, she understands how security protocols are supposed to work; after some of her followers complained about what she’d done, she responded, “[I] highly doubt anyone is twittering like me on this flight! shhh.” [More]
75-Year-Old Woman Attacks Convenience Store Robber
By 2.17.10
A man tried to rob a convenience store in Massachusetts while a 75-year-old woman was at the counter buying something. This did not please her. Unfortunately I can’t embed the video directly, but click through to Fox 8 News to watch the woman go all ninja with the price scanner gun. Never anger an old lady with a babushka! [More]
The IKEA Song
By 2.16.10
You’ll never get the ladies with those milk crates! You need to sex up your pad with some choice items from IKEA, the furniture that helps a boy become a man. Riegel and Blatt show you how in this comedic ode. Beware, there is some NSFW language and guy in boxers humping Swedish furniture. [More]
Learn To Love Your Messed Up Toyota With This Parody
By 2.11.10
Funny or Die wants to help Toyota out of this awkward situation it’s found itself in, so the site has posted a helpful video of a cheerfully steely spokeswoman who likes to point with both hands. It’s like she’s shooting good news in your face! Pow pow! And really, it’s true that you can have an awesome garage party without ever needing to take your Toyota on the road, so maybe you should stop being so pessimistic. Video below. [More]
Come On Down To The Ugly Furniture Store!
By 2.10.10
Want ugly furniture? How about a teardrop filled with frog eggs? Want an ugly table to put ugly stuff on? We’ve got that! This is a parody commercial for a real store filled with hideous furniture. [More]
Ohio Strip Club Raises Money For Haiti
By 2.9.10
If you visited the strip club Marilyn’s on Monroe in Toledo, Ohio, last weekend and paid the cover charge for their “Lap dances for Haiti” evening, congratulations, you helped the club raise nearly $1,000 for a local charity that’s trying to send a container of relief supplies to Haiti. Oddly–as you already know if you attended–there were no actual lap dances because they’re illegal in Ohio. The local charity says they need $5,000 to send the supplies, but luckily two other area strip clubs are staging their own fundraisers later this month. [More]
Dealership Ad Fail
By 2.4.10
Bill found negotiating with the dealership to be a little one-sided. [Craigslist via Failblog] [More]
Spirit Airlines Releases Another Naughty Sounding Promo
By 2.2.10
Last year Spirit Airlines had something called a M.I.L.F. Sale. They played it off as an accident, but I don’t think anyone believed them. Now they’re at it again, this time with an otherwise generic online ad that “accidentally” puts the word “muff” next to the word “diving.” Hmm, maybe that customer service number that really directed callers to a phone sex line wasn’t an accident, either. I bet if you fly Spirit Airlines and ask the flight attendants for some salted nuts, they burst into shameful giggles and run off. [More]
Road Runner Rep Acts All Weird About Request For Upload/Download Speeds
By 2.1.10
Richard sent us this screen capture of a chat he says he recently had with a Roadrunner CSR. I can’t figure out why the CSR would withhold bandwidth stats from a customer, nor why she would capitulate so quickly when Richard asks for her supervisor. Maybe that’s one mean supervisor. [More]
Ever Eat Chocolate Collon?
By 2.1.10
More prawn udang crisps? How about some Chocolate Collan? These and other exotic delights can be found in Steve Portigal’s Museum of Foreign Groceries. Zipping around the world as a product consultant, Steve snaps pictures of kooky food packages from foreign lands and uploads them to this Flickr set. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got a craving for Pringles, Wild Consommé flavor.
Museum of Foreign Groceries [Flickr]
