Remember, kids: Mastication won’t cover your tracks if you’ve forged a credit card. Because now that you just spent a few glorious moments chewing up receipt paper, you’re still going to need to prove you purchased those items lawfully. Here’s where one Florida man charged with theft apparently didn’t think things through.

Police say the 20-year-old and another man aroused the suspicion of security officers at a mall near Boca Raton by trying to buy stuff with a fake credit card. Security followed the suspects to the Nordstrom store in the mall, thinking the twosome would strike again, reports the Palm Beach Post.

By the time cops had arrived, one man had driven off in the other BMW while the other walked through the parking lot with a shopping bag in his hand, containing two Gucci hats at $265 apiece and a Gucci bag. He told police he’d just bought the items from Nordstrom.

When officers questioned whether he’d used forged credit cards to buy the items, he first said he bought the Gucci products with cash. Then, while police were searching him for weapons, he reached into his pocket for a snack — a receipt snack. He allegedly shoved the Nordstrom receipt in his mouth and chewed it up.

After cops placed him in handcuffs, a security officer at Nordstrom simply printed up a new receipt showing a $561.80 total, and the bank confirmed that the name on the card wasn’t a match for the card’s three-digit security code on the back.

At least he went off to the police station with a full tummy…?

Man charged with theft at Town Center of Boca Raton tries to chew receipt to elude police [Palm Beach Post]

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