The supposedly classy New York Times Magazine had a 2-page ad for the Amish Heater this weekend, so with that and the cold times a-coming, now is a good time to remind everyone that the Amish Heater is just a standard space heater plus overpriced particleboard faux-wood mantle on wheels.

Consumer Reports tested the “miracle” Heat Surge Roll-n-Glow Electric Fireplace back in March and found it performed the same as a normal electric heater.

The device is currently $349 online, or you can, as the Heat Surge VP told the NYT, get a space heater for $29.99 from a big box store. You can answer for yourself if you the fake fireplace and rollability features are enough of a “miracle invention” to be worth the extra few hundred bucks.

Note: purple scare-quotes photoshopped.

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