If there’s anything we love at Consumerist, it’s feats of fast-food audacity. We’re not sure that the Glazed Donut Breakfast Sandwich at Dunkin’ Donuts even qualifies, though. Not anymore. Sandwiches on a donut might be a departure for Dunkin’, but everyone else has been putting burgers on them for years now. Yet some brave souls had to try it for themselves and find out. 

The sandwich is, essentially, a McGriddle on a donut. The donuts are plain glazed ones right out of the bin, and the sandwich also includes an egg patty and some bacon. The whole thing gets heated up together, and then you cram it in your mouth and wonder where your life has gone wrong.

Early reviews touted the sandwich as not bad, or at least not as bad as you’d automatically assume. The most surprising thing to almost everyone is that it allegedly only has 360 calories. The chain’s hometown paper, the Boston Globe, found taste testers on the street and asked for their opinions.

“[This is] like some sort of crazy food porn that doesn’t make any sense. I can’t imagine something so disgusting is what you’d want for breakfast,” one frequent Dunkin’ Donuts customer told the Globe.

Most other testers disagreed. “It’s like nothing else, one in a million, and the best of both worlds with the bacon and the egg, too,” one college-aged man said.

What does this thing look like when you open it up, though? What’s the ordering experience like? Have employees gotten the hang of making these things yet? What’s it like, from ordering to greasy remorse? For that level of exhaustive detail, we turn to All Over Albany, which bought, deconstructed, and posted a detailed review of the sandwich.

You can ignore the marketing hype: they say that breakfast has not been changed forever. The “cherrywood-smoked bacon” is a few flat and small pieces. The “pepper-fried egg” is a premade patty with a saucer-like shape that doesn’t taste like much of anything at all. It contains strange things like “Natural Sauteed Flavor” and “Artificial Butter Flavor,” which is odd considering the overall lack of flavor. Also, how is “sautéed” a flavor? Is “baked” a flavor? Can you bottle “toasted”?

The donut itself is nice, if you happen to like the plain glazed at Dunkin’. If you’re not used to eating them hot, be aware that the glaze melts and is quite sticky.

In the end? The reviewers weren’t crazy about it. If you’re going to consume that many calories and fat grams, there are better things you could be eating. They wrote:

[O]ur biggest complaint was the lack of flavor for those calories. There was glazed donut and not much else. Better egg and bacon might have helped. And we thought while eating it that we would have liked to hit it with some hot sauce.

Hey, Taco Bell, have you tried making donut quesadillas yet? I mean, I know you’ve already got the waffle taco and stuff, but think about it.

Trying the glazed donut breakfast sandwich at Dunkin’ Donuts [All Over Albany]

Here, if you’re curious, is the full ingredient list for the sandwich. We didn’t put it closer to the top because we figured that readers would zone out.

Glazed Donut: Donut [Enriched Unbleached Wheat Flour (Wheat Flour, Malted Barley Flour, Niacin, Iron as Ferrous Sulfate, Thiamin Mononitrate, Enzyme, Riboflavin, Folic Acid), Palm Oil, Water, Dextrose, Soybean Oil, Whey (a milk derivative), Skim Milk, Yeast, Contains less than 2% of the following: Salt, Leavening (Sodium Acid Pyrophosphate, Baking Soda), Defatted Soy Flour, Wheat Starch, Mono and Diglycerides, Sodium Stearoyl Lactylate, Cellulose Gum, Soy Lecithin, Guar Gum, Xanthan Gum, Artificial Flavor, Sodium Caseinate (a milk derivative), Enzyme, Colored with (Turmeric and Annatto Extracts and Beta Carotene), Eggs], Glaze [Sugar, Water, Maltodextrin, Contains 2% or less of: Mono and Diglycerides, Agar, Cellulose Gum, Citric Acid, Potassium Sorbate (Preservative), Artificial Flavor]; Fried Egg: Egg Whites, Water, Egg Yolks, Modified Corn Starch, Natural Sauteed Flavor (Soybean Oil, Medium Chain Triglycerides, Natural Flavor), Salt, Artificial Butter Flavor (Propylene Glycol, Artificial Flavor), Xanthan Gum, Citric Acid, Coarse Ground Black Pepper; Bacon: Pork, cured with: Water, Sugar, Salt, Sodium Phosphate, Smoke Flavoring, Sodium Erythorbate, Sodium Nitrite.

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