macbook

Internet Sneers At Apple/ Porn/ Laptop/ Child Post

Internet Sneers At Apple/ Porn/ Laptop/ Child Post

UPDATE: Finder Of Apple Porn On His Daughter’s Laptop Interviewed

Apple Sells “Refreshed” Laptop Filled With Porn To 11 Year Old Girl

Internet Sneers At Apple/ Porn/ Laptop/ Child Post

Apple’s Black Friday Deals

Apple’s Black Friday Deals

Today only, save on products from the Apple store.

Cure Random Shutdown Syndome

Cure Random Shutdown Syndome

Apple has released a firmware upgrade that they say is a solutions for Mac users suffering from RSS or “Random Shutdown Syndrome.”

Burning Macbook Adaptor Porn.

Burning Macbook Adaptor Porn.

It’s bad enough that the laptop started to burn on Adrian’s bed while he was in it… [More]

Consumerist Ask Metafilter Round-Up

• I’m toying with the idea of taking my friend who has Asperger’s to a brothel before he returns to Canada. Good idea or am I insane? [Link]

Macbook Random Shutdown of Doom

Macbook Random Shutdown of Doom

Somehow, owners of the new Macbooks got over greasy geek besmirching. They even learned to live with non-beveled corners. Now, after 1-2 months of ownership, a new culprit raises its fell head. It’s called, “Random Shutdown Syndrome” or “RSS” and it’s even got its own blog. There’s even a couple of YouTube videos.

Insects Love Apples

Whilst browsing the Apple forum, looking to find a solution for why my MagSafe connector wouldn’t actually charge my MacBook Pro anymore (solution? “Buy a new one!” Thanks, Apple chuckleheads.) I came across this remarkable cry for fumigatory technical support and the accompanying video illustrating his problem: insects living inside his monitor.

iBitch, or Paying For Your MacBook With $600 Worth of Five Spots

iBitch, or Paying For Your MacBook With $600 Worth of Five Spots

While dumping ten thousand pennies upon a counter says ‘Hobo Joe’ no matter how you look at it, it is better sometimes than walking around with a huge wad of small bills.

Dell vs. MacBook Reveals Tepid Warmth, Not Exciting Scalding

Dell vs. MacBook Reveals Tepid Warmth, Not Exciting Scalding

Dells spontaneously combust. MacBooks melt scrotums. If reports are to be believed, ether company’s laptop is hot enough to cauterize lopped off limbs. But which one is hotter?

Blogobitchin!

Blogobitchin!

• When your MacBook is cooking, Apple prefers you sizzle blind. [Tuaw] “MacBook Pro heat problem heats up”

Dang MacBook’s So Hot, Could Fry An Egg

Dang MacBook’s So Hot, Could Fry An Egg

I love my MacBook Pro: it’s damned hot. And by ‘damned hot’, I mean that not only does it cause vacuous hipster chicks to spontaneously become impregnated when they see me walking by with it tucked under my arm, but I also mean that it’s fortunate that such divine conception happens, because after months of use, my loins look like someone fired a laser cannon at the crotch of a Ken doll.

Inflammatory Macbooks

Inflammatory Macbooks

Sometimes Apples have worms in them. Appledefects.com is a new blog dedicated to dissecting these worms. A recent one takes the cake. When the blog’s author complained about his Macbook running at 203 degrees fahrenheit, Apple told him, “the Macbook is a notebook, not a laptop, refer to your manual.” Which means that according to official documentation,

Greasy MacBooks Have Venereal Disease

Greasy MacBooks Have Venereal Disease

What do these things have in common? The thighs of a cheap harlot. The armpit stains saturating a large Italian man’s undershirt. The Cheetos-dusted palms of a role-playing gamer. A used piece of toilet paper. A three-week old Macbook.

Apple ‘Genius’ Messes Up Customer Refund

Apple ‘Genius’ Messes Up Customer Refund

As I wrote a few weeks ago, I recently bought myself a beautiful new MacBook Pro. I love the thing: it is the most beautiful computer I have ever owned. Nevertheless, Apple didn’t make it easy for me to give them two thousand dollars. Between that and the smug jackasses working the Genius Bars whom you practically have to beg to just try to fix your computers, I love my Apple just as much as I want to insert a catheter up one of those Geniuses’ urethras and then force him to jump up and down on a trampoline.