It’s National Library Week and BuzzFeed has put together a list of the top 20 passive aggressive library signs. It’s hard to choose a favorite, but here are 3 we especially like. [More]
funny
"Brownie Husband" Brings Emotional Eating To Delicious New Level
By 4.12.10
Tina Fey’s new fake commercial for a product called “Brownie Husband” is delicious and gross. (Whoever made the prop should get a special award.) It captures in one ridiculous product all the promises advertisers make about filling your emotional needs, with just a microwave and a vacuum-molded plastic tray. It’s also kind of food porn-y. Watch it below. [More]
Video: Too Weak To Move Your Arms? The Food Lift Feeds You!
By 4.9.10
We’ve all experienced the the age-old quandary, “I’m hungry, but I’m too weak/lazy to move my arms, whatever shall I do?” Enter the Food Lift! It’s a revolutionary new product that takes the work out of eating! Simply place the food in the trough and then the dynamo-screw lifts the meal through the tube into your mouth, “like a waiter climbing a staircase.” Try one today! [More]
Video: Plunder Funnel! New Consumerist Original Scam Spoof
By 4.7.10
How would you like to be wallowing up to your eye sockets in filthy lucre?!?! PLUNDER FUNNEL is a sure-fire money-making factory that will teach how you to cannibalize any human relationship and turn it into cold hard cash. Taylor Sternberg from Broadway’s “Jersey Boys” stars in this Consumerist original video parody, written and directed by Ben Popken. [More]
There Aren't Any Jobs Because These Five People Work Everywhere
By 4.6.10
There’s a funny post at the blog Fair Trade Photographer about cheap stock photography, particularly how companies who try to cut corners end up using the same image over and over. Barton has a serious message for companies, too: if you want us to trust you, maybe you shouldn’t put a generic stock photo of generic office people on your generic website. [More]
Plunder Funnel Live This Sat
By 4.6.10
Catch PLUNDER FUNNEL, starring Taylor Sternberg from “Jersey Boys” on Broadway, this Saturday at 7pm at Coco 66 in Brooklyn. Written and directed by me, Ben Popken, and shot by Consumer Reports kickass video team, the new new Consumerist short skewers late-night get-rich quick schemes with gleeful abandon. The spoof gets shown as part of a free show my sketch comedy troupe DANGER CLUB is throwing down, but, of course, you’ll get to see it on Consumerist first. Deets inside. [More]
Man Receives Ticket While Walking From Car To Parking Meter
By 4.5.10
This image, currently going crazy on reddit, speaks for itself. We hope it is real, but also hope that it isn’t. Ya know? For humanity’s sake? Or at least the City of Melbourne’s sake… [More]
Customer "Damn," Your Order Is Ready
By 4.1.10
Dan’s name is Dan, but Panera seems to have heard differently, as evidenced by this receipt. “We all had a good laugh,” Damn, oh damn, I mean, Dan, writes. [More]
7 Ways To Tell Your Neighbors Are Running On Empty
By 4.1.10
Writing on LiveCheap, Karl Wolf put together a sad-but-funny list of signs that reveal the poverty of those who live near you. [More]
AirTran Makes Fun Of Southwest Seating In Commercial
By 3.31.10
If you’ve ever been part of the mad dash for seats on a Southwest Airlines flight, you might find this video from AirTran funny. In it, mooing passengers race down the jetway while a Southwest employee makes ridiculous jokes. Meanwhile, AirTran serves its assigned-seat passengers Kool-Aid. Wait, now I’m confused about who’s being mocked here. [More]
Erotic Japanese Game "Cross Days" Tricks Pirates Into Posting Personal Info Online
By 3.31.10
If you’re trying to pirate the Japanese erotic manga game Cross Days–and I don’t care what people say, I love that I live in a world where I can type that phrase–you should know that the game’s developers are wise to you, and they’re going to do their best to shame and embarrass you. [More]
The Census Is Getting Weird With Its Marketing
By 3.30.10
“Nobody expects the U.S. Census! Our chief weapon is surprise!” A Seattle blogger posted a photograph of a fortune she received in her fortune cookie recently, and it looks like the Census is using surprise fear and surprise surprise, fear, and a ruthless efficiency to remind people to send back their forms. Oh, and they’re ruining fortune cookies. I fully expect to be forced into a comfy chair soon, which all in all isn’t a bad way to be tortured, so meh. [More]
These Antenna Installation Instructions Are Surprisingly Specific
By 3.29.10
I am typing this post with a digital TV antenna stuck in my ear, and all because nobody told me that this wasn’t the right way to install it. Ow! Apparently Antennas Direct of Missouri knows that there are people like me out there, because they’ve included some very specific warnings on their installation instructions (PDF). (Thanks to Billy!) [More]
Tim And Eric's Crazy Price Fight! Blood!
By 3.29.10
Tim’s got discount prices, Eric’s got premium prices. No, they’re not selling goods and services at discount and premium prices, they are selling actual prices. “Get $39.99, for forty dollars!” Adult Swim’s Tim and Eric parody discount super-stores and crappy local ads. NSFW for crude gestures, sexual remarks, and a horse beheading a man. [More]
Walgreens Has A Loose Definition Of The Phrase '50 Percent Off'
By 3.29.10
Jason spotted this photo at a Minnesota Walgreens. We ran the numbers and discovered that $7.49 is less than 50 percent off of $9.99. But the giant “50% Off” lettering looks so darn attractive that it’s tough to fault the store’s management from making the incorrect claim. [More]
Stouffers' Doesn't Want You To Kill Yourself
By 3.24.10
Yes, this is a fake news story from The Onion, but putting suicide prevention tips on frozen food is a pretty good marketing idea. I mean, if you kill yourself, you won’t be buying any more Stouffers’… right? [More]
Video: Kotex Apologizes For Years Of Euphemistic Ads
By 3.24.10
In this new Kotex ad, the 90-year old tampon company sends up, well, Kotex. “How do I feel about my period? I love it…Usually, by the third day, I really just want to dance,” says the actress as trio of women frolic and twirl. “The ads on TV are really helpful because they use that blue liquid, and I’m like, ‘Oh, that’s what’s supposed to happen.’” It’s to launch their new line of feminine hygenie products called “U,” which pander to women’s desire to feel like they’re not being pandered to. [More]
Everything Is Five Bucks, And Completely Random, On Fiverr
By 3.24.10
Fiverr is a website where people post gigs they’re willing to do for five dollars. Does it work? I dunno, but it’s a lot of fun to read through the offers: someone will burn a small paper effigy of your enemy, or send you a sock puppet, or turn a photo into a cross-stitch pattern for you. My favorite is, “I will give you $10 if you find two people to give me $5 for $5.” [More]
