The woman in line at the drive-thru at a McDonald’s near Cleveland simply wanted to order some fast food and be on her way. Presumably that’s what she wanted, anyway: she was in the drive-thru line. Restaurant employees called police when she was unable to order due to slurred speech, then fell asleep at the wheel, blocking the drive-thru.

There are plenty of neurological conditions that cause slurred speech and sudden sleepiness, but the woman in the drive-thru last week started to cry when police came by and said that they would be giving her a sobriety test. The Cleveland Plain Dealer reports that she declined a breath test, but failed other tests administered in the field. When officers asked her about any medical conditions that would affect her ability to perform sobriety tests, she claimed to have swine flu: a miserable disease, sure, but not one that makes people appear to be drunk. She also failed the ability-to-stay-awake-while-ordering-burgers test, which is not an official thing, but perhaps should be. The customer and was arrested on suspicion of drunken driving.

Pick of the blotter: Drunk woman tries to order from McDonald’s drive-thru [Cleveland.com] (via Cleveland-booster Drew Carey)

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