Blaming The Beer-Battered Fish You Ate Before Driving Will Not Make A Failed Sobriety Test Disappear

The thing about eating food that’s been cooked in booze, is that it’s been cooked. And because you usually cook with heat, any alcohol that started out in that liquid is that still remains by the time you eat it is not enough to make you drunk. But basic science didn’t keep one Wisconsin driver from brewing up a boozy food excuse for failing a field sobriety.

Because fried fish and beer go together like um, delicious fried fish and delicious fried beer, I am unsurprised that a Wisconsin man went for the excuse of beer-battered fish affecting his driving ability. But yeah, the cops didn’t go for that excuse, reports

A man suspected of his 10th offense of operating while intoxicated was stopped by police after a deputy saw his truck cross the center line of a highway, and that it had a broken tail light.

When he noticed a smell of alcohol on the 75-year-old man’s breath, the officer administered a field sobriety test. That came up with a result of 0.062, well over the 0.02 limit the suspect had to be under as part of his previous convictions.

Deputies say the man denied he’d been drinking any booze, but said instead that he’d been eating beer-battered fish earlier that night. And the fish were drunk. And everyone had to drink a beer before taking a bite and the oxygen in the room was pumped fool of booze molecules. Those last reasons are also made up, because I made them.

He was also cited for third-offense operating while his license is revoked, having open intoxicants in a vehicle and operating left of center in the incident, and is due in court in January.

Deputies: Man suspected of 10th OWI says he ate beer battered fish []

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