We know what that hollow, empty feeling in the center of your chest is. You’re feeling bereft because you don’t own bundles of discarded facial hair, which previously resided on professional baseball players’ faces. It’s your lucky day, since Gillette has decided it’s a great idea to auction off shavings it’s dubbed “beard balls” from Boston Red Sox players David “Big Papi” Ortiz and Shane Victorino. It’s all for charity, but eww.

For those of you who need to round out your memorabilia collection with something utterly unique and a bit grody, Gillette announced today (via CBS Boston) that the beard balls from Ortiz and Victorino are now open for bidding on eBay, with a starting bid of $100.

The shavings were collected during the public face-scraping of Ortiz and Victorino after the Red Sox won the World Series last month.

All proceeds will benefit Movember, the men’s health charity that encourages all your man friends to grow ugly/amusing/otherwise hairy mustaches during November and collect money from their friends and family for doing so. Whether or not your dad/brother/boyfriend/boy who is a friend looks good is beside the point — the charity seeks to raise funds and awareness for prostate and testicular cancer.

Should you become the lucky owner of either “his one-of-a-kind, 100 percent authentic, David Ortiz 2013 Championship Beard Ball,” it’ll come with a nifty little display case and of course, the razor used to shear those facial locks. Because obviously you’ll want to show off your beard ball to everyone…?

Charity! It’s all about charity.

Beard Shavings From David Ortiz, Shane Victorino Up For Charity Auction [CBS Boston]
David Ortiz Authentic 2013 Championship Beard Ball [eBay]
Shane Victorino Authentic 2013 Championship Beard Ball [eBay]

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