Kaleb has the bad fortune (maybe) to live in a part of the Midwest where it snowed at the beginning of May this year. The storm was so bad that it led to a power outage, and the power outage led to some businesses closing. While the power was out. In the case of one Office Max, every business around them was bustling with activity while they remained closed.
It was the sign on the door of the fully lit store saying that the closure was due too [sic] the power outage that really got to Kaleb.

He writes:

So…yeah, we got a snowstorm last night. Big fun, granted that we hit 81 degrees a few days ago – and sure, some power problems were experienced.

This morning.

I arrived at the Office Max in [redacted] at about 7:30PM – they’re open until 9:00PM on weekdays. Needed to drop off a prepaid FedEx shipment – and they’re the only place in [town] where you can do such a thing – or anywhere nearby, even. Takes me 20 minutes to drive to [that town]. We’d heard from multiple sources that [redacted] had gotten its power issues all straightened out by noon at the latest. Friends were shopping, getting groceries, going to the bank, and even going to the movies.

All of which are things right next to Office Max.

So imagine my surprise when I arrived at said Office Max to drop off my shipment, and I see the aluminum bar things are locked in place behind the doors and a sign taped to the window indicating that they were closed “due too power outage!!” Well, at least they didn’t close themselves due to poor grammar skills.

You’ll notice, though, that all the store’s lights are on. As they are at every other store, restaurant, and movie theater in the immediate vicinity. Which are all open. And have been since noon, at the latest. Those business are all open and, you know, doing business. Because generally speaking, businesses tend to be in business for the purpose of doing business.

Apparently this Office Max is far too cool for that though. Any schlub can run a business when you’re actually open for business. Staying in business while not being open for business…that’s what separates the men from the boys. Or the women from the girls…or the dogs from the puppies, or whatever else you want to say. It also separated me from trying to get my packaged shipped.

At which point I cast the box upon the ground held my fists up in the air and in a deep, gravelly voice yelled “NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!”

…actually I didn’t. But I would have amused myself immensely if I did.

This is Consumerist, so we generally say “separate the cats from the kittens.”

We can only picture Kaleb’s reaction to be something like this infamous retail meltdown outside of Toronto’s Eaton Centre a few years ago.

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