Except for those who actually work in the food service industry, the general public is largely unaware of restaurants’ inner-workings, and after you read the following article you may concede that ignorance is bliss. Reader’s Digest has complied a list of 13 confessions of a waiter which are excerpts from a book called “Waiter Rant: Thanks for the Tip–Confessions of a Cynical Waiter” by an author who simply goes by “The Waiter.” See some of our favorites, inside…

2. There are almost never any sick days in the restaurant business. A busboy with a kid to support isn’t going to stay home and miss out on $100 because he’s got strep throat. And these are the people handling your food.

3. When customers’ dissatisfaction devolves into personal attacks, adulterating food or drink is a convenient way for servers to exact covert vengeance. Waiters can and do spit in people’s food.

4. Never say “I’m friends with the owner.” Restaurant owners don’t have friends. This marks you as a clueless poseur the moment you walk in the door.

13. Never, ever come in 15 minutes before closing time. The cooks are tired and will cook your dinner right away. So while you’re chitchatting over salads, your entrées will be languishing under the heat lamp while the dishwasher is spraying industrial-strength, carcinogenic cleaning solvents in their immediate vicinity.

Check out Readers Digest’s article for the full list.

We can think of no better time to abide by the Golden Rule then when eating at a restaurant. On two occasions, I actually exited a restaurant before the food was served because I felt that I had displeased the staff and feared their retribution. After reading these confessions, I think my instincts were dead-on.

13 Things Your Waiter Won’t Tell You [Reader’s Digest]
(Photo: Getty)

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