It certainly didn’t help John’s mood that before reaching the specialist, Chase suspended his account. Chase stopped service because John called in from an “unrecognized number” (his office line) and was disconnected mid-department transfer.

“When I finally got to the retention specialist, dude was like “I can give you 10.74% on your account.” I told him, “I am already an American Express customer, and I have an offer in my hand: 0% for 12 months on purchases and balance transfers. If you can’t match that then close my account and go fuck yourself.””

Price-matching with lan.

“ I hope the CEO of Chase Bank dies in a fire” [The Alpha John]

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