Helium Shortage Makes Clowns Cry on the Inside

Pity the clowning industry. Thanks to a global helium shortage, helium balloons, mainstay of spoiled children’s birthday parties, will be hard to come by in coming weeks.

And not just clowns. Goodyear blimps and squeaky-voiced pranksters are shit out of luck, with no alternative on the horizon.

“When people see balloons they know that’s where the party is.” So true. But will people know where the party is, if there are no ballooons? Transitive logic be damned!

Helium shortage could deflate some fall parties [Columbus Dispatch]