Our sexy sister site Fleshbot—yes, she’s easy; no, we don’t mind—has put together their ‘Horny Valentine’s Gift Guide Guide.’ In case you need help dissecting the title, please let us assist you before you click the link.

‘Horny’ means there are pictures of dildos and breasts, so if you work in a more staid environment, please wait until you’ve headed home before you start shopping.

‘Guide Guide’ means it’s a guide to guides, serving as a index to others’ ideas.

‘Gift’ means you should probably buy your sweetheart the ‘Clone a Willy,’ which allows one to mold a life-sized recreation of a penis in chocolate. Our suggestion? Offer your loved one a clone of your best friend’s penis and see if they recognize it. Be both romantic and resourceful!

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