topposts

“Consumers seeking bargains were led to believe that lower online prices had expired or never existed.”

“he fries, however, were a different story. In the menu photo, “garlic parmesan fries” are served in a ramekin and look quite tasty. Instead, I was served a cylinder of slimy, greasy fries with a couple pieces of parmesan cheese on top.”

“After all the fees have been collected, it has a credit limit of $53.”

“Maybe we’re missing something, but this is America and if a girl wants to board an airplane wearing a mini skirt, a bikini top and a football helmet, she should be able.”

“”Fucking customers, I’m tired of everyone not listening when they don’t even know what they’re talking about.”

“When Pierre visited Ibiza, Spain and other parts of Europe for two weeks, his iPhone went with him, and he returned with memories of a hedonistic summer vacation, and a $4190.76 bill from AT&T”

“Thus, the many, many consumers (other than the original intended recipients) who have been forwarded a copy of the same coupon by others and tried to redeem it at Blockbuster outlets have been informed (by store personnel and/or in-store signage) that the coupon is not legitimate and will not be accepted.”

“Meet Kyle Shoemaker, a 9-year-old with two credit cards and an $18,000 line of credit. Kyle is a victim of identity theft.”

“…you got the putting calories on the menu thing right. Now, let’s try draping the calories across the sub in a geometrically satisfying pattern, the one that fulfills the design destiny intended by your sandwich scientists.”

“The sad part is that she passed away in a car crash only days later which quickly formed rainclouds over everyone’s perverted parade.”

“Why go to the trouble of manually hacking Amazon’s URLs to search for bargains when we’ve got all the messy work done for you?”

“We’ve been hearing that consumers who try to sign up for the plan are getting a sales pitch for a more expensive plan, hung up on, transferred to the switchboard, etc.”

“When buying any product, expect the salesmen to tell you that after around 13 months, a certain part or battery will need replacing. The common manufacturers warranty only covers 12 months parts and labor, so the customer is pushed to buy the extended warranty under the impression it will fail later…”

“…knowingly collecting an unlawful consumer debt, and using abus[ive] means to do so, in violation of the Fair Debt Collection Practices Act…

“Poison toothpaste, killer cough-syrup, and tainted pet food are the tip of the disgusting iceberg of yuck heading our way from China.”

“Your first instinct will be to say, “Simon, fat is the point of bacon.” Then you will look at the picture above and realize that your second instinct, to vomit, is in fact, the correct one.”

“Geek Squad agents scour your computer for those porn pics you and your girlfriend(s) took, and load it onto their thumb drives. Even the ones you thought you deleted.”

“…there’s nothing really horrible about the call except that it’s exactly like every customer service call you’ve ever had to make. It’s oddly infuriating.”