dead

(CBS DFW)

Police: Funeral Home Got Evicted, Left 8 Bodies Behind

Two weeks ago, a funeral home in Fort Worth, Texas received a “notice to vacate” letter from their landlord, and they moved their business from the premises. The problem is, some customers were allegedly left behind. By “customers,” we mean eight people who are deceased were found in the building. Now the mortuary is being treated as a crime scene. [More]

Bank Of America Wants Customer To Travel 1,500 Miles To Close His Mother's Account

Bank Of America Wants Customer To Travel 1,500 Miles To Close His Mother's Account

It hasn’t even been a month since our last dead Bank of America customer story, but here the bank is at it again, refusing to let a woman’s son close her checking account no matter what he does. Although she lived and banked in Tennessee and he lives in Pennsylvania, the latest nonsense has the bank demanding that he visit Texas in person to get a document notarized. [More]

Dying Won't Get You Out Of Your Dish Network Contract

Dying Won't Get You Out Of Your Dish Network Contract

Dish Network has extremely loyal to Elizabeth Cordry of Forth Worth, Texas. So loyal that they would let nothing remove her from the ranks of their customers. Including her death. When she died in January at age 85, her son tried to end service, but the company insisted that she had a contract that could only be canceled if her family produced a death certificate. Since she was no longer under a contract, her son refused to produce the certificate. [More]

Once Facebook Thinks You're Dead, You're Dead Forever

Once Facebook Thinks You're Dead, You're Dead Forever

We saw this coming as soon as Facebook introduced the memorial status for the Facebook accounts of dead people. It was bound to happen at some point. Facebook has begun declaring people dead. Well, specifically, people are having their friends and loved ones declared dead as a prank, but it’s nearly impossible to rise from the Facebook dead. That’s what happened to Ryan, who has been dead for over a month now. [More]

Customer Finds Dead Mouse In Toyota

Customer Finds Dead Mouse In Toyota

Greg was replacing the speakers in his 2003 Camry and uncovered a stinky little tomb in the rear of the car. He thinks it must have happened at the plant, but I can’t tell. Who wants to weigh in on whether the mouse tried to build a nest, or whether Toyota used mouse-enhanced stuffing on the assembly line? Oh, there are pics after the jump, but I made one of them less disturbing by adding a little sweater.

Facebook Nags You To Communicate With The Dead

Facebook Nags You To Communicate With The Dead

If you’ve logged in to Facebook lately, you may have noticed the site’s suggestions on the right-hand side telling you to write on the wall of someone you haven’t communicated with in a while. This is merely annoying for most of us, but sort of a punch in the gut when the person you’re being told to get back in touch with is dead.

Honor Your Favorite Deceased Infomercial Celebrity This Halloween

Honor Your Favorite Deceased Infomercial Celebrity This Halloween

One of the inexpensive Halloween costume ideas suggested by readers was to dress in honor of the deceased and beloved infomercial pitchman Billy Mays. (This costume is especially simple if you already have dark hair and a beard.) Today, Billy Mays III announced a Billy Mays costume contest, sponsored and judged by his friends and colleagues at Sullivan Productions.

Buy Your Dead Fish For Less At Walmart

Buy Your Dead Fish For Less At Walmart

A reader sent us the following pics of the neglected aquariums in her local Walmart in Carmi, Illinois. She complained to a manager, but when she checked back “several hours later,” the tanks remained untouched. Well, the dead fish were probably slightly smaller, since the remaining live fish were eating them.

U.S. Government Sees Dead People, Cuts Them Stimulus Checks

U.S. Government Sees Dead People, Cuts Them Stimulus Checks

Whippersnappers who are still young enough to work get a tax credit, but 52 million Social Security recipients will get $250 stimulus checks in the mail or direct deposited. Yay! Except for how as many as 10,000 dead people are receiving checks.

Save Money On ProFlowers Roses, Re-Gift Last Week's Flowers Instead

Save Money On ProFlowers Roses, Re-Gift Last Week's Flowers Instead

Why pay for ProFlowers when you can get the same effect by dumpster diving for old arrangements that look just as good? Our reader Hakoken3 paid ProFlowers $92 so they’d deliver 18 roses to his girlfriend this morning on her birthday. He paid extra to ensure that the roses would be delivered by noon, and at 12:01 they showed up. Unfortunately, they were so wilted and near-death that they looked like hand-me-down flowers that some luckier person had thrown out.

"Empathetic" Debt Collectors Want You To Pay The Debts Of The Dead

"Empathetic" Debt Collectors Want You To Pay The Debts Of The Dead

Who is responsible when dead people owe money? The New York Times says that the law varies but, “generally survivors are not required to pay a dead relative’s bills from their own assets.” That doesn’t mean they’re going to tell you that when they come calling about an unpaid bill.

Allen's Bribes Customers Who Find Dead Rat Heads In Their Italian Green Beans

Allen's Bribes Customers Who Find Dead Rat Heads In Their Italian Green Beans

Texas wedding caterer Dale Cane found a dead rat’s head in one of the twenty cans of Allen’s Italian Green Beans he bought at Walmart. Allen’s quickly offered Cane $200 if he agreed to keep quiet, and assured him that “the Pasteurization process renders the product sterile and completely safe for consumption.” Even worse, this isn’t the first time a dead rat’s head popped up in a can of Allen’s Green Beans…

If You Are Planning To Die Soon, Avoid Bank Of America

If You Are Planning To Die Soon, Avoid Bank Of America

Because Marc B. hadn’t used his account for a few years, Bank of America decided he must have died, and froze his account. Then they started charging a maintenance fee, which eventually overdrew his account. Full email inside.

Sprint: Please Keep Paying Your Dead Father's Cellphone Bill

Sprint: Please Keep Paying Your Dead Father's Cellphone Bill

Sprint wants Tracey Stewart to keep paying her dead father’s cellphone bill. Sprint is not completely heartless: they offered to cut his monthly rate to $10 until the contract expires in September.

UPDATE: Sprint Will Cancel Dead Brother’s Cellphone

A Sprint PR rep contacted us regarding our post, “Sprint Refuses To Cancel Dead Brother’s Cellphone” and it seems they want to help.

Sprint Refuses To Cancel Dead Brother’s Cellphone

Sprint refuses to cancel the cellphone service of a reader’s dead brother. The most they’ll “bend” for reader M is to “put the account on vacation,” at $5.95 a month.

Verizon Declares Woman Dead, Stops Her Pension

Verizon can’t do anything right lately. A reader sends us a story from the Philadelphia Daily News about a Verizon retiree who has been declared dead by Verizon. Now they’ve not only cut off the woman’s pension, but they’re trying to get several of her checks back.

Another Corpse Billed by AOL

Another Corpse Billed by AOL

Now that AOL’s dissolved their call centers and gone free, we certainly hope that all billing issues customers have been wrestling with have been resolved. In particular, their habit of continuing to bill the dead.