Dramatic Readings Drastically Improve All Yelp Reviews

Image courtesy of The pain of spoons.
The pain of spoons.

The pain of spoons.

Used carefully, Yelp can be a great resource to learn about the best local dining establishments and other businesses and keep up-to-date on new places that open. One thing has been lacking on the site for a long time, though: a sense of drama. Fortunately, the YouTube channel Real Actors Read Yelp is here to fix that gross oversight on Yelp’s part, hiring talented stage actors to get across the true agony of an improperly prepared sandwich.

For example, in this review, subpar utensils lead to untold suffering at a frozen yogurt place.

An excerpt, in case you’re at work and can’t watch videos:

Never in my life have I encountered such an uncomfortable utensil. It’s not that it’s hard to hold, or that it has a seam that pokes into your fingers. No, the problem is the shape of the bowl. Using the spoon to put yogurt in my mouth actually hurt my lips. I don’t really know if the bowl is too deep, or if the rim of the bowl is oddly curved, but EVERY SINGLE BITE the thin hard edges of the bowl pushed into my upper lip as I tried in vain to enjoy what would have ordinarily been some perfectly fine tart frozen yogurt with mango, blackberry and mandarin orange segments.

(Full disclosure: a friend of mine wrote the yogurt place review, which is how I learned about this channel.)

And here, a trip to P.F. Chang’s results in a cascade of condiments:

Again, an excerpt from the original text:

Our food was sub-par for such a highly rated restaurant: overcooked fish, underdone noodles, and one dish that wasn’t labeled spicy was so hot that my father refused to eat it.

I won’t be going back to this particular PF Chang’s: I’ve had better food and service at other locations. If you do venture downtown to this restaurant, BRING YOUR RAINCOAT! You’re going to need it.

Real Actors Read Yelp [YouTube]

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