Mark is not a shoplifter, yet due to a combination of high-pressure doormen and bad weather, he found himself sprinting out of a Walmart to a receipt-checker’s dismay.

Let him explain:

At the exit the alarm goes off. The greeter calls my attention and said they may not have removed a tag that triggers the alarm. A few seconds later an uniformed asset protection individual comes and and grabs my basket. He says, “can I see your receipt”? and I say sure as I was in good mood because of the cashier. My hands where full as I was carrying a drink I purchased at the McDonald’s inside Walmart, so one handed I looked inside my two front shirt pockets and couldn’t find it.

I move to my front pants pockets and my employee leans over and says to me, “the cashier didn’t give you the receipt”. I asked if she was sure and she responded in the affirmative. I replied to the AP individual that the cashier must not have given me the receipt. Immediately he starts opening my bags and says, “I am going to have to ask you to wait until I can check the receipt”. My mood turned as I felt he had no right to look inside my bags at the items I purchased. I stated, “I’ll give you five minutes to get it figured out” as I was still not to peeved to comply.

I followed up with, “I’ll wait over here” as I moved to the side. He grabs the basket and says, “you have to come with me”. I said, “no, I will wait right here”. He told me that he could not leave the merchandise alone. In which I replied to him, “either can I and I will wait with my merchandise right here.” I reminded him very sternly, “you have five minutes”. At this point I moved from irritated to pissed. …

He tells me that I need to go get the receipt, which I declined, and reminded him that his five minutes was ticking. He asked my employee if she could go get the receipt. She sheepishly looked at me for a decision and I nodded in the negative.

She looks at him just as sheepishly as she looked at me and said, “sorry”. He grabs the basket and tries to pull it back away from me. I said, “Look! I told you I am going to wait right here and I am going to give you five minutes to get it sorted out”. To which he replied, “either you or the merchandise need to come with me”. Fed up I said, “If you think I stole something call the police, I’m leaving”. He muttered something under his breath and just looked at me. I pulled the basket away and said “let’s go”. As I got just outside the doors I noticed it was raining something fierce. I handed my employee my drink and we ran to the car to get out of the rain.

As I popped open the trunk, I thought how it must really look like we where stealing because we were running, although we where running to stay dry not to get away. I glanced behind me and expected to see staff at least looking at us if not coming towards. Nothing. We drove off and continued on our way.

What’s your most adrenaline-pumped story of receipt-checker evasion?

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