Demonic Dip Jar Causes Bloodbath

Personal finance blogger Penny Frugalista spins a campfire tale of how she and her husband were mangled by a stubborn, stabby Tostitos Southwestern Ranch dip jar.

In her darkly humorous post about the incident, she blames Tostitos for the carnage, which left her and her husband with hand lacerations after they dared to relieve the jar of its contents. The Mister was the first to cut his hand on the jar, which he put back in the fridge rather than throw away, figuring it was a freak accident. When Penny Frugalista — unaware the jar had already attacked her husband — had a go at the container, she suffered the same fate.

She blogs:

But since he was sleeping, I couldn’t ask him exactly what happened. Upon further inspection of the glass jar of dip, I saw not one, but TWO chipped areas under the lid. I have no idea how they got there, since if you dropped the jar (which we didn’t), the lid would theoretically protect that particular area from chipping. There were no scuff marks on the lid, either, indicating that it didn’t receive any damage. I think the glass was damaged during the manufacturing process — I can’t see any other way for it to have occurred.

She concludes by saying she’ll be filing a complaint with Tostitos but says it’s “pretty funny Tostitos caused a bloodbath” at her house.

Tostitos Dip Caused a Bloodbath at Our House [The Penny Frugalista]


Edit Your Comment

  1. UCLAri: Allergy Sufferer says:

    I had a glass bottle once cut me because of chips at the mouth of the bottle. Not so fun times.

    Not sure what a complaint would accomplish, but it’s possible there’s a problem with the bottling plant at some point.

  2. Grogey says:

    I would worry that there would be glass in the dip if its missing on the rim.

    • Miss Dev (The Beer Sherpa) says:

      Precisely. Whenever I find a chip in the lip of a jar or bottle, I immediately throw it away and contact the company to let them know of the issue (if necessary). I don’t contact them to get compensation, but some companies don’t know about a problem with their equipment until a customer complains.

      There are two likely explanations of how/when these chips occurred. The first is that the jar was chipped prior to production, which would hopefully be caught by QA, but might go unnoticed if the chips were small.

      The second, more likely, explanation is that the chips occurred when the jar had the lid put on. Lidding/capping machines are notoriously sensitive and need to be properly calibrated so they don’t jam the top on too lightly or too hard. When I worked at a brewery, the most common cause of the lip of our bottles chipping was the capper jamming the caps on too hard.

      We did random QA of bottles from each batch throughout the run to catch such issues and rarely had a problem with the capper because of diligence, but it is a concern.

    • pecan 3.14159265 says:

      Not to mention you might have bled on the dip.

  3. SomeWhiteGuy says:

    Why would you put a bottle back in the fridge that just cut up your hand? Why not relocate the contents into another container and smash the sh!t out of the offending jar.
    The first cuts, yes blame Frito-Lay, but the second blame the husband. I think he was mad and didn’t want to be the only one in the household who had cut up his hand on a jar so he left a trap in the fridge.

  4. xnihilx says:

    Big deal. Take it back to the store and they’ll give you a new one. End of story.

  5. AustinTXProgrammer says:

    I was at a bar a decade ago when the bartender opened a bottle and handed it to me. I tool one look at it (in very low light), handed it back with some sort of comment like let’s try again. The top of the bottle had broken off when she roughly opened it. That could have been very unpleasant had it been later in the night!

    • syzygy says:

      This often happens when bartenders use bottle openers on twist-off bottles. The threads on the twist-off make the rim less robust than the standard pry-off type, so they shatter more easily. Yet another reason to avoid beer that comes in twist-offs. And also to not drink from the bottle.

  6. Loias supports harsher punishments against corporations says:

    I read it as Tip Jar, and the story took a much different path. I blamed the OP, “serves her right for stealing from the tip jar.”

    • ColHapablap says:

      Yeah, it was probably the 4th time reading the phrase that I realized it said “dip” and not “tip”. “Why are they blaming Tostitos for a tip jar? Why are they putting it in the fridge?” Etc.

    • YoorCriptonite says:

      I did too oddly enough. I was confused.

  7. Intheknow says:

    That’s not funny, just stupid. Come on, you saw the chips in the glass and reached in anyway?

  8. craptastico says:

    it doesn’t say anywhere that this was a new jar. maybe they were pouring some out of it previously and knocked it against a bowl or something and chipped it. believe it or not, sometimes consumers break their own stuff, and not everything is a manufacturing defect.

  9. Burrrr says:

    When I worked at a bar we used a little spinning brush machine to clean the insides of glasses. I once pushed a mug down and I spun it around on my finger so I could dry it off using a towel. Unknown to me the base of the handle was cracked and sliced my finger the whole way around (it acted kind of like a can opener, of sorts). Fortunately it wasn’t that deep and it was more of a flesh wound then something needing stitches.

  10. AllanG54 says:

    Sounds like someone couldn’t open a jar and stuck something under the lid to try and pry it away to release the vacuum seal and make it easier to open. Maybe that’s how the glass got chipped to begin with.

  11. Applekid ┬──┬ ノ( ゜-゜ノ) says:

    I miss glass jars. Peanut butter, mayonnaise, now even my beloved travel size Listerine are all now plastic. They have so much utility and are easy to clean when you’re done.

  12. Caffinehog says:

    Three words:
    Multimillion dollar lawsuit!
    Heck, if you can win after pouring hot coffee on you…..

  13. nutbastard says:

    Did someone maybe have trouble opening it, and then did the ‘hit it with a spoon to break the vacuum seal’ trick?

    “if you dropped the jar (which we didn’t), the lid would theoretically protect that particular area from chipping.”

    The lid is thin metal and easily dented, it is not a magical kevlar vest. go grab a jar of something and strike the lid, it’s not hard to chip the glass underneath.

  14. MarvinMar says:

    I see a bright future for these guys in infomercials.
    They can be the people who can’t do the simple tasks before the product that solves it is shown.

    IN this case, the solution is those little round rubber mats you place over a lid to get a better grip.

  15. HogwartsProfessor says:

    What the HELL is that picture supposed to be!?!