National Pork Board Attempting To Halt Sales Of Canned Unicorn Meat

The ever-vigilant folks at the National Pork Board are out to put an end to the sale of Radiant Farms’ canned unicorn meat. But it’s not because they want to stop the slaughter of the one-horned flying horses, it’s because they say the product infringes on their “other white meat” trademark.

The unicorn meat in question is actually a fake product dreamed up by the resident geeks at for April Fool’s. But in the site’s listing for the product it had read “Pate is passe. Unicorn — the new white meat,” and that was enough to bring out the Porker’s legal cease-and-desist team.

The Pork Board lawyers put some effort into their 12-page letter to ThinkGeek, prompting the site to issue a public apology:

“It was never our intention to cause a national crisis and misguide American citizens regarding the differences between the pig and the unicorn,” said Scott Kauffman, President and CEO of Geeknet. “In fact, ThinkGeek’s canned unicorn meat is sparkly, a bit red, and not approved by any government entity.”

ThinkGeek also goes on to point out the irony of being attacked by the Pork Board, considering all the site has done to promote consumption of pig-based products by selling over 15 “pork-inspired” items like Bacon Soap, Bacon Lip Balm, Bacon Mints and BaconPop Flavored Popcorn.

To appease the Pork Board, ThinkGeek has now changed the slogan for Unicorn Meat to “Caviar is so 1980s. Unicorn is the sparkling, crunchy, savory meat of today’s elite.”

Officially Our Best-Ever Cease and Desist []