Close Reading Of Press Release Shows Why Everyone Hates AT&T Wireless

The 3G Microcell, the mini cell tower that AT&T has been threatening their customer base with since last fall are coming soon. AT&T Wireless customers remain underwhelmed. Why? Using technology similar to Consumerist’s own Megglefish, Tested’s Will Smith translated the press release from PR-speak to English for us, and teased out the precise reasons why this is a terrible, terrible idea. It’s all there. You just have to find it.

Here’s a sample:

$150!!!! Wow, I have to pay $150 because AT&T’s shitty network only works in my bathroom? Should a customer who has signed a 2 year contract worth about $100/month have to pay to extend AT&T’s network to cover someplace that they spend 12+ hours a day? That’s just insane.

Stick with MagicJack’s femtocell (if it ever comes out) and wi-fi if you have a smartphone, kids.

This Is Why People Hate the Phone Company, AT&T [Tested] (Thanks, Aron!)

Live In An AT&T Dead Zone? There’s A Fix, But It’ll Cost You

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