UPS’ horse, Big Brown, failed this afternoon to deliver a much-anticipated Triple Crown victory. Maybe he’ll try again tomorrow from 2pm-5pm. [AP/Chicago Sun Times]


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  1. VikingP77 says:

    Methinks a lot of people lost money on this!

  2. BalknChain says:

    Look at you cracking jokes! Nice. Did you see Blakely’s pic from Belmont on Gawker? *shudders*

  3. tedyc03 says:

    Carey, oh how that hurts! ;-)

  4. chiieddy says:

    At least they didn’t pump him so full of drugs that he broke both legs and they had to put him down on the track. I hate this sport. Absolutely cruel.

  5. swissdietcoke says:

    My sister rides horses for a living. Horses LOVE this. It isn’t cruel. Accidents happen.

  6. mgy says:

    It says online that Big Brown actually delivered a win today. Are you sure you were at the track? And you don’t see the win? Are you sure?

  7. thewriteguy says:

    He better win or UPS will ship him off to the glue factory!

  8. Didn’t he lose and thus is not in contention for the triple crown???

  9. gibbersome says:

    Yay, he lost! Now back to real life! :)

  10. Whiskey Tango Foxtrot says:

    It just goes to show that nothing is ever a “sure thing” in any sport. You never can really predict what is going to happen. Sure it was a unbelievable upset, but thats part of the unpredictability that draws people to the sport. There will be a triple crown winner again, one day!

  11. Half Beast says:

    In other news, Da’Tara managed to net me 380 bucks.
    I’m glad I followed my gut. I’ve seen it so many times, I just felt like the Triple Crown would be elusive for another year.

  12. glass says:

    That’s why I come here: horse racing news.

    Thanks Consumerist!

  13. glass says:


    In case you couldn’t TELL, I was being SARCASTIC!


  14. glass says:

    (bonus points to whoever gets the reference. even more bonus points to whoever notices what words I misquoted)

  15. Maulleigh says:

    LOL!! Okay, that’s funny.

    Poor horse. Well, as Seinfeld said in his bit about horses, “it’s all the same oat bag.”

  16. gig says:

    Ok so it is obvious you don’t all care about horses or food that is cancerous or horses or kids feet or horses or anything really other than P2P and the 6788 DVD players and 898hjuy brand movies and digital 78654 players. You think it is Ok to pump a horse full of steroids and run them on immature legs that haven’t fused so they break every ankle. Oh they just love that. Lets move on to something more important like Dell putting you on hold. Sickening. This horse was not right before the race and shouldn’t have been run. He was run for greed and your entertainment.

  17. jjason82 says:

    I’m sorry, what does this have to do with consumers?

  18. zanthia says:

    Why does UPS have a horse? Do they represent/sponsor every single sport? Who do they sponsor in curling?

  19. notallcompaniesareevil says:

    Okay, okay. I will admit I enjoyed that post.


  20. @swissdietcoke: I’d love pumping myself full of steroids too. I’d also like the retirement with nothing but bitches if I win. However, I’m not so sure about the part where they make me into dog food if I lose. Or the part where they kill me if I get injured because they doped me up on painkillers to race when I shouldn’t have.

    People who raise foie gras for a living say “The ducks love the feeding tube that I shove down their throat three times a day!” Somehow, I don’t believe them.

    The NY Times had a good article today: If Big Brown Wins, Horse Racing Loses. Horse racing doesn’t have to be cruel, but the current status quo is.

  21. @jjason82: It’s funny. Laugh.

  22. The name was a tribute to UPS and does not reflect ownership in the horse by UPS.

  23. speedwell (propagandist and secular snarkist) says:

    @Isabelle15: Just curious. Do you also get bent violently out of shape when you see sports on TV?

  24. GinaLouise says:

    @mgy: This is the funniest thing I have ever read on the Consumerist. Bless you, fellow poster.

  25. PunditGuy says:

    Big Brown is suspending his race; he hasn’t conceded anything. He insists he’s still the best horse for the job.

  26. Scuba Steve says:

    He’s not gonna be glue. He’ll have years of stud-work ahead of him, then glue.

  27. JustThatGuy3 says:


    Dunno if he does, but I do.

  28. gig says:

    No. My get violently bent out of shape mode is pretty much limited to the horse racing industry, the fat millionaire owners of race horses, cruelty to horses and animals and people who are completely indifferent to the cruelty. It pretty much sends me over the edge. I should have counted to ten before commenting.

    I do think this story is consumerist worthy though. Consumers spent money betting on this horse. The product they bought is a chance. You can be sure that the owners and trainers knew he was going to have a problem. But they ran him anyway (this is the part that gets me violently bent out of shape.) So basically a lot of consumers got ripped off.

  29. gig says:

    That was in response to your question Speedwell. I forgot to hit the reply to comment button.

  30. Trai_Dep says:

    Carey, excellent joke!

  31. jjason82 says:

    @Michael Belisle: I’m not sure I get the humor here. A certain horse didn’t win a race… and? Is here a hidden joke I’m not getting or something?