Katherine, a new Comcast subscriber, was setting up her online account access when for reasons unknown it told her that she must talk the online CSR. Suddenly she felt fear and trepidation radiate down her arm and settle into her mouse hand. She took a deep breath, said a silent prayer and clicked “CHAT NOW.” What proceeded was a mind numbing 20 minutes of her life that Katherine will never get back. Her letter and chat log inside…

Hi consumerist,
I’m writing in about your absolute favorite company. I wanted to be able to pay my new Comcast bill with a credit card, which means that I had to set up online access to my account. Well, Comcast, being the helpful company that they are thought it would be great to automatically change my preferences from receiving a paper bill to solely getting electronic statements. Well, I still wanted paper statements, just wanted to be able to pay my bill online. I figured changing back would be easy, but, as you guessed, it wasn’t.
When I went to Manage My Account, and tried to change “Delivery Method” to paper statements. Comcast redirected me to a site telling me that my choice would require talking to a CSR, and included a big orange button saying “chat now”. I hit the button, and had the following hilarious interaction with a chat CSR. Turns out the only possible way to reinstate paper statements after Comcast automatically stopped them is to call Comcast. I’ve only been a customer a week, and they’ve already made me wish I picked DSL in my new apartment!

Lethel > Hello guest_, Thank you for contacting Comcast Live Chat Support. My name is Lethel. Please give me one moment to review your information.

Lethel > It would be a pleasure assisting you today. How are you doing?

guest_ > hi- i would like to receive a paper bill, which automatically was replaced with e-statements when i signed up for online access to my account

Lethel > Can you please acknowledge that you are still at your computer?

guest_ > i am at my computer.

Lethel > Thank you.

Lethel > May I know your name, please.

guest_ > katherine *******

Lethel > Hi Katherine! Thank you for asking that. <

Lethel > May I ask how long have you been a Comcast customer.

guest_ > is this really all necessary just to reinstate a paper bill?

guest_ > less than a month

Lethel > I see.

Lethel > Katherine, I will ask your assistance to call us in 1-800-COMCAST to request for that.

guest_ > are you kidding? please explain why you can’t reinstate this

Lethel > We will be more than glad to send you a paper bill as soon as you gave us a call.

guest_ > why is this not as simple as a chat session? please explain

Lethel > I can give you the breakdown here online but I can’t send you a paper bill.

Lethel > You may need to request for it.

Lethel > May I have your account number, please.

Lethel > I do apologize for the inconvenience.

guest_ > i don’t need one sent. just need my preferences changed so i receive them

Lethel > I will try to help you with that.

Lethel > May I have your account number, please.

guest_ > i am looking it up. one moment

Lethel > Sure.

guest_ > ******************

Lethel > Thank you very much for the information. May I ask for your complete address, too.

guest_ > ****************

guest_ > ***************

Lethel > Thank you.

Lethel > May you give me a sec to pull up your account.

Lethel > Thank you for patiently waiting. I will ask you to log in to http://www.comcast.com. You may click the link the “customer”, then click “manage my account”, and change your STATEMENT DELIVERY to “paper statement”.

guest_ > it directed me to you

guest_ > said that i need to talk to a “csr” on chat.

Lethel > Let me try to do it for you.

Lethel > May you bear with me.

guest_ > thank you

Lethel > I do apologize but it require me to provide password.

Lethel > As much as I want to do it for you. But password is case sensitive.

guest_ > so there is no way for me to change my preference myself, and you can’t do it unless i provide you my password.

Lethel > There is a way. I suggest that you may try logging in again and changed your preferences. If it still directed you to us in live chat support, I suggest that you may call us to request for it. That is the easiest way to changed your preferences in your account.

guest_ > well, this has been a waste of my time

Lethel > I do apologize for the inconvenience.

Lethel > I understand that your time is valuable.

guest_ > is there any place i can lodge a complaint for how highly inefficient this has been? it seems that comcast needs streamlining if something as simple as changing bill delivery options requires so much effort

Lethel > I am sorry to hear that. You can call us in 1-800-COMCAST. As much as I would like to help you but I am limited to our system here. And also, password is a case sensitive which
are not allowed to ask to our customer.

Lethel > The reason why I was suggesting earlier that you may call us in our customer hotline so that we can assist you right away with your concern. You have reached sales department.

Lethel > I can only place orders and provide information with our products.

Lethel > Is there anything else I can assist you with today, Katherine?

Lethel > Can you please acknowledge that you are still at your computer?

guest_ > there is not

Lethel > Thank you for your time. I hope you will give us a call and assist you with your concern.

Lethel > Thank you for choosing Comcast. We do appreciate your business. Please do not hesitate to chat with Comcast again at http://www.comcast.com. We are always available, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.

Lethel > Analyst has closed chat and left the room

We can’t that say we’ve ever heard the name “Lethel” before but the sound of it certainly embodies the Comcast we have come to know and loathe. We are still trying to figure out why Lethel kept dragging Katherine along, only to declare at the end that she was merely an impotent sales rep. We hear so many of these stories that we don’t even get upset any more, we just say, “that’s comcastic!”

(Photo: jorny)

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