Starbucks is going to downsize their drink menu in order to speed up the endless Starbucks waiting experience, in which grouchy decaffeinated customers stare uncomfortably at bottles of “ethos” water while they plan how best to murder the customer ordering a coffee that takes 14 words to describe. According to the Associated Press.

“Starbucks also said it plans to cut the number of different drinks on its menu, a move it hopes will help baristas get customers through the line more quickly.”

Don’t get your Juicy Raspberry in a twist over it, Seattlest reminds us of the Starbucks “secret menu” (you can order whatever you want and they have to make it for you) and the infinite possibilities it contains.

Will fewer choices speed up the line? We remain unconvinced. We are willing to bet that some of those 750 calorie monsters will slowly slide off the menu. Thanks, Menugate!

Simplify, Simplify: Which Drinks Will Be Axed From Starbucks’ Menu? [Seattlest]
Starbucks 3Q Profit Climbs 9 Percent [Yahoo!]
(Photo:Scarequotes)

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