iPod Vending Machines Soon To Prompt Mass Killings

What the…? This is stupid.

Australian vending machine firm Zoom Systems intends to litter the United States with iPod vending machines. Swiping your card through the electronic labia of the boxy machine, $300 dollars will be subtracted from your account and a brand new iPod will gracefully tumble out. Or so they claim.

There’s a lot of reasons why this is a dumb idea, but the big one that comes to mind is does anyone really want to live in a world of $300 vending machine transactions? When the distributing coils of a vending machine don’t correctly eject my Snickers bar, or my finger slips and I accidentally press D4 instead of C4, at least you’re only out seventy five cents. What happens when the coils don’t fully revolve on an iPod and while you’re trying to find a manager to rectify the situation, the next clod who comes along gets two? Machine gun massacre at the Zoom Systems head office, we imagine.

Vending Machines Sell iPods [Local 6]