Over at Strange New Products we saw this amazing handkerchief with a built-in nose pocket for catching and collecting expelled mucus. But the other alternatives are so much more amazing. Dye it black, blow your nose, then let go. Now you’ve got the perfect ninja mask. Fold one corner into the pocket and balance it upon the crown of your head — a respectable yarmulke. Turn it upside down and it fills the function of collecting unwanted post-coital drippings.

The list goes on and on, we’re sure we’re missing some. It’s a slow news morning, so why not while away the time in the comments section, twisting your imaginations in pursuit of alternative functions. As usual, the filthier and more disgusting, the better.

Handkerchief With Nose Pouch [Strange New Products]

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