Gillette Razor Blade Hyperdrive

I, Brownlee, may have mentioned this before… but I am a huge fan of Gillette’s multiple-razor initiatives. I can still remember the first time I experienced the Mach 3, like an angel’s tongue lusciously licking the follicles off of my cheek. The next day, I marched into work and, with a word of stern command, began ordering stray co-workers — men, women, it didn’t matter — to caress, nay, fondle my cheeks. “What you’re feeling is very similar to what my ass once felt like as an infant,” I’d confidently assert. If this made my co-workers uncomfortable, it was well hidden by the awe which enraptured them at the touch of my silky-smooth jowls.

The Mach 3 Turbo wasn’t much of a step-up, but the Power blew me away. Who knew that pressing three vibrating razors up against the flesh would work out so well? And I’m positively twitching over the Irish advent of the five-bladed fusion. How much better can it get? How many more razors can Gillette’s brilliant shaving engineers cram into a safety razor?

Well, the Economist have examined the question and put together a mathematical curve, plotting Gillette blades over the last hundred years. Their conclusion? A 14-blade razor may well hearken the 22nd century. However, they admit they don’t have enough plot points to truly determine the mathematical curve, and speculate that we may achieve razor blade hyperdrive in the next few years. Excellent!

The Cutting Edge [Economist]

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