East Coast Suffers Horrific Ice Cream Bar Shortage

Much of the Northeastern United States is currently dealing with a heat wave that has household pets plastered to cold tile floors and local news outlets hauling tired puns out of winter storage. But the real crisis is occurring out where fleets of white trucks prowl the mean streets of suburbia in search of customers. The combination of an exceptionally warm spring and a Good Humor plant shutdown in Maryland mean that vendors are struggling to get hold of some popular Good Humor products. Who is suffering? The children.

Or maybe just the ice cream truck operators. The owner of the wonderfully named Mr. Ding-A-Ling near Albany, N.Y. notes that his total sales are down 5%, and popular Good Humor products such as toasted almond bars are only available in grocery stores, not from his wholesalers.

Unilever, parent company of Good Humor, is closing a plant in Hagerstown, Md. and moving production to other ice creameries in Missouri and Tennessee as part of an overall consolidation of operations. But the warm spring meant an early start to ice cream season, and some items are running out. Oreo bars were in short supply earlier this spring, and now east coast distributors are having a hard time getting hold of Toasted Almond, Candy Center Crunch and Chocolate Eclair bars.

“It sucks to tell someone you don’t have something,” one ice cream man near Buffalo, N.Y. told the Associated Press. “In most cases they’ll just pick something else but they’ll look a little disgusted.”

Will our suffering ever end? Yes, a Unilever representative told the A.P. Later this summer.

Shortage of some Good Humor bars puts ice cream truck customers in a bad mood [AP]

Comments

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  1. ScottCh says:

    Um… Press release?

  2. George4478 says:

    If my kids started yelling that ‘Mr Ding-a-Ling’ was back and he’s heading for our house, I’d be grabbing a shotgun.

  3. Torgonius wants an edit button says:

    Perhaps it would be helpful to know why the plant in Maryland was shut down?

    too expensive to maintain the plant?
    workers too expensive?
    too expensive to get ingredients to plant?
    innumerable health code and safety violations?
    CEO just decided to close it and pocket the cash?
    Maryland/county/local government wanted to impose a fatty tax on ice cream production?

    • Blueskylaw says:

      The Hagerstown plant is closing permanently as part of a
      consolidation of the company’s U.S. ice cream operations.

  4. Loias supports harsher punishments against corporations says:

    Also suffering: child molesters.

  5. Blueskylaw says:

    Don’t worry, we’re all taking this in good humour.

    Takes a bow and quickly ducks backstage.

    • Loias supports harsher punishments against corporations says:

      *throws tomato, narrowing missing would-be comedian

  6. dolemite says:

    New York: “People are getting chunky, and it’s time government steps in to tell them what to eat and drink. No more soda!’
    New York: “There is a shortage of our favorite fat and sugar frozen treats. Something must be done to increase the supply!”

    • gman863 says:

      Since most ice cream treats are under 16 ounces, I guess Bloomberg thinks they won’t make kids chubby.

  7. Schildkrote says:

    “Oreo bars were in short supplier earlier this spring, and now east coast distributors are having a hard time getting hold of Toasted Almond, Candy Center Crunch and Chocolate Eclair bars.”

    Spellcheckers are also apparently in short supplier. The heat must be making typos more frequent.

    • 401k says:

      You should re-read your post atleast 3 times before you click submit…especially if you are going to mock someone else’s grammar/spelling.

      • Schildkrote says:

        “Atleast” I know when someone’s sarcastically mocking someone’s typos by including those same typos in their post.

        See, I used “atleast,” which is not a word, because you used it incorrectly in a post trying to white knight Mary Beth Quirk! Get it? It’s a joke!

      • BeamMeUp says:

        That’s not spell check, that’s auto correct. :)

  8. caradrake says:

    There’s an ice cream truck that patrols our neighborhood – I think it’s something like “Krazy Ice Cream.” We have only managed to catch the truck once, and their prices are insane. An ice cream sandwich starts at $3. The Spiderman/etc type ice creams are $4-$5.

    I say ‘catch the truck’ because he is usually doing around 30 miles an our through our neighborhood; even if we’re standing outside the second we hear the music, he’ll still pass us by. It’s like he wants to get the route done as quickly as possible, rather than trying to earn money.

    Waiting for the ice cream truck was a fond childhood memory of mine, so I wanted my kids to experience that, as an occasional treat, even if the costs are o.O.

    • CalicoGal says:

      I bet that’s because ice cream is not his “real” product, if you know what I mean…

    • Applekid ┬──┬ ノ( ã‚œ-゜ノ) says:

      Those prices don’t sound so bad, considering it includes delivery to your street.

      I never got to experience them as a kid, though, my mother was convinced they sold poisoned ice cream or added razor blades. Now that I’m an adult, I feel awkward going without a child in tow.

      • caradrake says:

        I guess not. When i was a kid, it was fifty cents for the ice cream sandwich, between 10 and 25 cents for an ice pop, and $1.50 for one of the shaped ice creams.

        And I wasn’t a kid all that long ago!

    • NickJames says:

      Inflation has killed it aswell for my local truck. He drives around the high school that I live across from and everything in the last 6 years has gone up by a $1 or more.

      1999
      -Italian Ice Cups 25 cents
      -Popsicle 50 cents
      -Bar 75 cents
      -Cone $1
      -Cartoon Bar $1.50

      2010
      -Italian Ice Cups $1
      -Popsicle $1.25
      -Bar $1.75
      -Cone $2
      -Cartoon Bar $3

    • iesika says:

      He might be speeding in between parks or summer camps. More profit to be had at either end than in the journey in between.

    • NotEd says:

      Don’t you know he speeds through your neighborhood to keep the kids thin? Never let it be said the the Krazy Ice Cream man doesn’t care about your kid’s heath.

      • NotEd says:

        And by that I was referring to the Heath Bars your child loves so much.

        Darn edit button shortage.

    • Warren - aka The Piddler on the Roof says:

      “Waiting for the ice cream truck was a fond childhood memory of mine, so I wanted my kids to experience that…”

      Yeah, I know what you mean. It’s a fond memory of mine, too. Unfortunately, like Halloween candy that could be eaten without first running it through an X-ray machine, that happiness just doesn’t exist anymore in this world.

  9. Dagny Taggart says:

    SOMETHING MUST BE DONE!!!

    THINK OF THE CHILDREN!!!!

  10. Tardis78 says:

    Won’t someone think of the children.

  11. dush says:

    As long as there are enough Drumsticks to go around.

  12. eezy-peezy says:

    Want to win Cheap Parent of the Year award? Convince your kids that the ice cream truck only plays music when he is sold out.

  13. morethanwysiywg2 says:

    Ice cream truck in our neighborhood sells good humor bars for $9 each…That’s Cape Cod for ya.

  14. Warren - aka The Piddler on the Roof says:

    What’s the deal with ice cream trucks nowadays? When I was a kid back in the 70s, one of the local ice cream places would send out the ‘Ding Ding’ truck. It was a clean, white 1960-something Chevy delivery truck that played a simple tune. And the kids went bat shit crazy when it came around, like they’re supposed to.

    Now whenever I see an ice cream truck it looks like a serial killer mobile with stickers all over it and John Wayne Gacy behind the wheel. I never see any kids around when they drive slowly past and the music gives me the f*cking creeps.