Usually when we announce the winner of the annual Worst Company In America tournament, the victor chooses to quietly reflect on their triumph rather than make a public comment. But not this year’s champ, Electronic Arts, which has responded to being voted the WCIA winner by hinting that it’s not as bad as other companies.
Whether it’s on a console, a PC, a smartphone or tablet, hundreds of millions of people play video games every day. Yet most mainstream media covers the industry the same way it treats adult dodge ball leagues and cat fashion shows (both noble ventures, but neither of them multi-billion dollar industries). And the only time you hear legislators discuss video games is when some politician decries them as the death knell for all things righteous in the world (hint: they’re not). Now, after years of being ignored and relegated to steerage, game-players have voted to send a message to Electronic Arts and the gaming business as a whole: Stop treating your loyal customers like crap.
A record number of voters have turned out to choose between Bank of America and Electronic Arts for the winner in the Worst Company In America 2012 tournament, but there’s still time to have your say in which business walks away with the Golden Poo.
This sort of epitomizes the last 12 months for AT&T. First it attempted to leap-frog to the head of the wireless pack by swallowing T-Mobile whole, only to fail miserably after many months and at a cost of several billion dollars. Then it came tantalizingly close to vying for the coveted Worst Company In America Golden Poo trophy, only to be given the smack-down by a video game company. At least it won’t be leaving the tournament empty-handed.
Here they stand, surrounded by the carved-up carcasses of their fallen competitors. “Make us proud… Win the poo,” the ghosts of the vanquished call out from another realm, demanding that these two remaining contenders for Worst Company In America prove that all this bloodshed was not in vain.
As we announced on Friday, for the first time in Worst Company history, readers will have the chance to vote on a third-place finisher from between the two companies eliminated in the Semifinal round. This means that either Walmart or AT&T will end up being honored with the coveted Bronze Poo trophy.
Last year, when Bank of America lost by the narrowest of margins to BP in the Final Death Match of the 2011 Worst Company In America tournament, we listened to readers who called for the creation of the first-ever Silver Poo trophy. That honor will remain in place for the 2012 tourney, and will be joined by a Bronze Poo for the company coming in third — or rather, “turd” — place.
This is it. Only one bout remains before we get to the Worst Company In America Final Death Match. But will it be the established telecom terror or the rookie greedy game-maker that vies for the Golden Poo?
Once again, Bank of America is so close to holding the Golden Poo it can taste it. And only one obstacle remains in BofA’s path to another shot at the WCIA crown. Of course, that obstacle also happens to be the world’s largest retailer.
What began as good, clean fun between 32 bad businesses quickly devolved into something so violent and grotesque that it would make a great PG-13 movie featuring Lenny Kravitz in a small but pivotal role. And now, only four contenders for the Golden Poo remain, each with a worthy claim to the trophy.
Imagine you’re playing a game of Worst Company In America Online, Game of the Year Collectors’ Signature Edition 2012 with your pals. You’ve paid hundreds of dollars for the game and all the downloadable tricked-out corporate logos, bloody finishing moves and deluxe cat photos and you’re about to head into the Final Death Match. Then your cable company decides you’ve gone over your data limit and the game grinds to a halt. And when you finally get it back up, the game’s servers have been pulled offline by the publisher. Which company do you end up hating more?
A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away… a young man with big dreams took down the Death Star in his X-wing starfighter. Can history repeat itself today, as Facebook’s precocious billionaire takes on the dark lords of the AT&T empire?
Which is mightier: bricks and mortar or bits and bytes? That age-old question will finally be resolved on the blood-soaked ultrasuede floor of the Worst Company In America Ellipse of Evil.
For several years now, these two terrible titans of industry have been locks to make the Worst Company semifinals. But in a year with so many bad businesses in contention, only one of these perennial favorites will make it through to the next round.
Two weeks ago, 32 of the nation’s worst businesses entered the Worst Company In America Battledome Nonagon, hoping to prove they could out-twit, overcharge and outlast the others to ultimately be named the Worst Company In America 2012. Two dozen companies have since been fed to the shark-eating robot piranhas and only eight remain with a chance to be crowned with the Golden Poo.
In spite of Spirit Airlines’ hilarious belief that it is the “most consumer-friendly airline,” it beat out the much-bigger Delta to make it through the first round of the Consumerist Worst Company In America tournament. But the airline says the people voting for Spirit have obviously not flown the discount carrier.
With all other remaining contenders having had their time trying to shoot each other with crossbows or burn each other alive with wildfire in the vast, Worst Company In America Hunger Games arena, Round Two comes to a close with this match-up between two reviled retailers.