Oh, how the mighty have fallen: The former ruler of wide swaths of parking lot as the world’s largest mall when it was built in 1976, Randall Park Mall near Cleveland, has been dead for years. But the final nail in the coffin comes this week as the building undergoes the final demolition from which no mall can return.
We asked, and oh boy, did we receive: For our third annual installment of holiday-induced panic on a wee scale, you, our dear readers, submitted 26 photos of your children freaking the heck out upon meeting the man in red, one Santa Cornelius Claus. Does Santa have a middle name for real? We might never know, but what we do know is that before children come to love the guy, they often want nothing better than to be as far from that jolly fellow as possible.
Where do the finest mall Santas come from? It’s not just anyone who is able to terrify children who the finest malls want to hire to rule over the North Pole and its lucrative photo business. There’s a special company that recruits and employs hundreds of Santas nationwide. While Santas vary, for some malls only the very best St. Nicks are suitable. [More]
Maybe you were kid-free in 2012, and last year your wee one was just a perfect angel when it came time to visit Santa Claus at the mall for that traditional photo opportunity. But if your kid freaked out at the sight of St. Nick or had a meltdown when faced with a costumed Frozen character, this year is gonna be yours.
Perhaps the only thing worse than being terrified by a mall Santa Claus is not getting to hang out with the guy when your heart is set on it. The family of a 7-year-old autistic girl in California says the youngster was “heartbroken” when she didn’t get to see Santa after a 30-minute wait, because he didn’t like the look of her service dog. [More]
There’s less than two weeks left until Thanksgiving Day, and consumers are beginning to learn which retailers will be open on the holiday so they can either plan their shopping trips or get very, very upset. Some people in Michigan have taken the “get upset” option, holding a protest outside of a mall that is scheduled to open at 6 P.M. [More]
There’s Christmas Creep, and then there’s showing up so early to the party that your guests aren’t even aware they’ve been invited yet. At least one mall in these United States has already ensconced the seasonal Santa Claus in his digs, surely giving some Christmas Creep curmudgeons out there a case of the grumbles. [More]
Last year, the Walden Galleria near Buffalo, New York welcomed shoppers at midnight on Black Friday. This year, they’re moving that start time back by six hours, and other malls owned by the same company, Pyramid Management, will be opening at dinnertime on the holiday as well. [More]
Police say that what happened yesterday at the Palisades Center mall in the suburbs of New York City was a terrible accident. Residents from a nearby group home for developmentally disabled adults were on a trip to the local mall, and somehow––nobody knows quite how yet––one of the residents fell over a third-floor railing, landing at the bottom of an escalator near the Best Buy store. He died on the scene. [More]
When people who are truly wealthy go shopping, they don’t always go to the regular malls that regular people use. No, people who drop six-figure sums at a single mall every year are entitled to a much fancier level of service, and there’s a Long Island mall that exists to provide it to them. Since the ’80s, Americana Manhasset has been a mall only for rich people. [More]
Normally, it wouldn’t be a huge deal to have one mall that sits on the border between two cities. There might be some small differences in laws or sales tax, but at the Westfield Valley Fair Mall in California, there’s a huge difference. It sits on the border between the cities of San Jose and Santa Clara, and San Jose recently raised the citywide minimum wage by $2. [More]
Boots and pants… where can I buy some boots and pants? Or haircuts? What about haircuts? Denim! My needs to be addressed, simply and set to music. Good thing there’s an awkward/genius commercial for a mall in New Jersey to fulfill all my shopping and amusement needs. [More]
A mundane crime occurred at the Arundel Mills mall in Maryland last night: an employee noticed three people shoplifting shirts and hats from a Zumiez store and alerted security. One of the trio escaped from security and ran away from the mall into a drainage pond nearby. Instead of escaping, he drowned. [More]
At first the idea of a mini Times Square sounds like a New Yorker’s worst nightmare — the real thing is bad enough, filled with swarms of slow-walking tourists and the glare of flashing billboards incessantly hawking whatever product can afford a spot there. But hey, not everyone can visit New York City, which is why a Moscow mall decided to bring that experience to Russia with a scale replica of the popular tourist destination. [More]
A word to any Hollywood screenwriters working on a scene where old cops go back to high school disguised as implausibly believable students — put those characters at a mall and real teenagers will know you don’t know what’s cool these days. Namely, malls are out, and restaurants are in as the new spot to hangout. [More]
Earlier this year, we told you about the questionable future of mall mainstay Brookstone, which has been mulling over the need to file for bankruptcy protection in order to keep selling massage chairs and gadgets that break a week after you buy them. That fate still looms for Brookstone, but its salvation may ultimately come from another mall mainstay that gives me flashbacks to endless hours spent perusing Iron Maiden posters and flipping through the pages of Truly Tasteless Jokes books. [More]
We always thought mall parking lots were asphalt jungles in more of a “It’s tough out there to find a parking spot” kind of way. Not an actual predator vs. prey, “I will bite off your finger if you take my spot” kind of way. On that note, guess what terrifying thing happened in a mall parking lot in New Jersey? [More]
Even as mall staples like RadioShack and Sbarro find themselves shutting down stores, and malls elsewhere across the land are rendered useless by online shopping, the Mall of America is planning on expanding in the next 10 years. So how is this megamall surviving in the midst of mall meltdown? [More]