Attention Profiled Shoppers: Consumerist is now in possession of an internal training document that teaches Best Buy blue shirts how to stereotype customers. While Best Buy’s use of personas has been known for several years, our exclusively obtained document contains several brand-new Best Buy personas, including “Maria Middle America” and “Empty Nesters” Helen and Charlie.
insiders
10 Confessions Of A Ritz Camera Salesperson
By 3.17.08
A Ritz camera salesperson writes in to give you the skinny on scanning, digital prints, and which memory cards are just a ripoff.
9 Confessions Of A Retentions Representative
By 3.16.08
Retentions representatives are the cellphone company’s last line of defense between you and freedom. One brave retentions representative has come forward to teach us how to craft a direct, earnest request that will lead retention reps to do your bidding. Rivaled in effectiveness only by executive customer support, retentions reps are empowered to strike down nuisance fees and bargain liberally, all to keep you as a customer. If you were ever tempted to threaten your cellphone company with cancellation, this one is a must read.
10 Things To Remember When Shopping At Best Buy
By 3.13.08
An employee of Best Buy apparently thinks too many days have gone without us posting something about the store, so he sent in his list of 10 things he thinks every customer should know when shopping there. Items 10 through 7 are all about warranties and service plans, so the usual caveats apply (make sure you know what’s really covered, and that it’s worth the extra cost to you). #4, however, is good to know: “Its pretty much pointless to call Corporate/Customer Service Hotline—they can not override a store’s decision. Best bet is to call or email a District Manager or higher.”
AT&T To Start Charging You For Paying Them Money
By 3.12.08
An AT&T insider tells us that starting March 11th AT&T has begun charging customers in the Southeast an extra $5 if they call in to make their payment over the phone by speaking to a customer service rep. He says this is set to be rolled out nationally starting in May. Please only speak to our robots, otherwise you will be punished, thanks.
7 Confessions Of A Verizon DSL Tech Support Rep
By 3.12.08
A former employee has stepped forward to tell us what it’s like to work as tech support rep in a Verizon DSL call center. Learn about how the supervisors aren’t really supervisors, the numbers and call times the reps have to meet to keep their jobs (and the sneaky tricks they use to meet these numbers), and more…
Uhaul Dealer's Tips For Happier Renting
By 3.10.08
What about all those tales about broken and poorly maintained trucks? His thoughts, inside…
Uhaul To Start Charging $1-$5 "Environmental Fee"
By 3.3.08
Uhaul is going to start charging customers a $1-$5 fee to defray the cost of throwing away the various nasty junks associated with its rental business, according to an anonymous store manager. It will be called an “Environmental Fee.” Ok, whatever, but we like the rebuttal supplied in the Q & A for Uhaul managers in case a customer complaints: “Do you want clean air and water thirty or fifty years from now? If so, pitch in.” Nice, avoid raising upfront prices and get customers to cover your operating expenses through the power of guilt. Full text of the announcement, inside…
9 Confessions Of A Former Sports Authority Manager
By 2.24.08
A former Sports Authority manager came forward to explain why their coupons are so damn useless. According to our tipster, “the coupons are always a sham,” but apparently, gift cards worth less than $10 can be redeemed for cash. Read his other nuggets of knowledge along with zesty executive customer service contact information, after the jump.
36 Confessions Of A WaMu Banker
By 2.18.08
– About the WaMu Free Checking, yes it is a different “free” checking account. We just came out with the “WaMu” part about a couple of years ago, so if you have any “free” checking account older than that I suggest you change it to the newer one.
Barnes & Noble Limited Receipt Policy Won't Go National Until October?
By 2.12.08
A Barnes & Noble insider tell us the new policy limiting returns to 14 days with receipts won’t go in effect nationally until October, according to CEO Steve Riggio’s internal blog.. The policy is currently in testing in New York, New Jersey, California, and Virginia. “The point is to eliminate “customers” who empty their bookshelves of books they’ve owned for years and get store credit. The company line is “to bring our policy in line with other national retailers,” the insider tells The Consumerist. However, “the ability to “extend” the policy beyond the 14 days will be up to the compassion of the store/manager you encounter.” Looks like all you non-VA-CA-NY-NJ shysters have until October to ply your fiendish book return schemes.
Executive Email Addresses For XBOX Complaints
By 2.8.08
If you have a problem with your XBOX and you want it heard by senior executives, here are some dudes to blast it to:
Monster Cables, Monster Ripoff: 80% Markups
By 2.8.08
Ever wonder why gadget store employees push Monster cables like they’re crack? Bitchin’ markups, just like you suspected (or knew) all along. That’s what we found when a Radio Shack employee sent us his store’s entire inventory list, which included the wholesale and retail price of every item in stock.
Mortgage Broker Confessions
By 2.7.08
“When I have a client I really don’t like — he’s a pain in the ass — that’s when I charge as much as I can get out of them,” one mortgage broker told the Joe Consumer blog. That’s right, a lot of mortgage broker fees are bullshit. It’s important to get a good faith estimate and shop around for things like your title and escrow.
Tiger Direct Sales Contest Thinks Pimps Are Funny
By 2.5.08
It’s really funny to rape women, beat them, force them to have sex with other men for money, and then take all their money. Which is why this internal sales promotion for gadget seller TigerDirect is so awesome! Start by selling a customer a notebook computer, then PIMP it up with all sorts of accessories. In turn, the more you sell, the more you get entered into a raffle to win some PIMP prizes so you can PIMP out your crib with pimpin’ a new computer and a pimp 50″ plasma TV with surround sound and a Logitech Harmony 1000 Universal Pimp Remote Control! The promotional flyer proclaims, “Now you have a controller in one hand and a cup full of Gin & Juice in the other. You got the nice gifts and the greens $$$$$$ in your pocket. Now you’re OFFICIALLY PIMPING!” Pimps are a hilarious American icon of entrepreneurship! PIMP PIMP PIMP! Full promotional flyer and contest rules, inside…
Countrywide Made Racist Sub-Prime Loans?
By 2.5.08
Countrywide Home Loans was racist and automatically put African-Americans into exotic and expensive sub-prime loans they didn’t want or need, and couldn’t afford, according to a former employee. This employee worked there for two years up until the sub-prime meltdown. They write:
“…a customer would be qualified for a loan because their credit score and other factors based on the written product description, however, when I went in to put their (this only happened to African-Americans) – they were not qualified for the loan product and had to be referred to Countrywide’s subprime mortgage company Full Spectrum. Full Spectrum offered higher rates and fees. I got wise one day and started not inputing the race so the computer could give me “approval.”
10 Confessions Of A Circuit City FireDog Technician
By 2.1.08
A FireDog Technician writes in with the following confessions.
Comcast Call Center Sales Contest Sheet: "Don't Let These Freeze Masters Get You"
By 1.31.08
From inside a Comcast call center, we got a sales goal sheet designed to excite call center reps to sell more new customer bundles using with four cartoons icons of cold; Sub-Zero from Mortal Kombat,, Mr. Freeze from Batman, Frozone from The Incredibles, and Ice-Man from X-Men. The flyer exhorts: “ANTI FREEZE INCENTIVE. Don’t let these freeze masters get you…Sell some bundles and protect yourself from the cold!!!” If you’re in the top three of your department, the flyer continues, you can win $250, $150, or $100 for 1st, 2nd, or 3rd, respectively. Exciting. What is the symbolic function of the “freeze masters” as a performance incentive? What does, “the cold” represent? Left out in the cold? Given the cold shoulder by your peers if you’re not contributing enough to the 2000 bundle goal? An inability to pay one’s heating bills? We have no idea, we’re just glad we don’t work in a call center, we’ve never been too good at winning knife fights. (click to enlarge).
