There once was a wise cartoon masked wrestler who said, “A one that is not cold, is hardly a one at all.” What Strongbad* was referring to, friends, is beer. And that’s exactly why a retail group in Indiana filed a lawsuit last year to challenge a state law barring the sale of cold beer in convenience and grocery stores. It was all for naught, however.

A federal judge threw out that lawsuit this week, which wanted any retail outlets that hold a beer dealer permit to be able to sell cold beer, reports TheIndyChannel.com (has autoplay video).

The decision upholds current state law which says that only package liquor stores can sell “chilled” beer, everywhere else it’s peddled at room temperature.

The Indiana Petroleum Marketers and Convenience Store Association filed the suit in May 2013, claiming that the law violates the equal protection of the U.S. Constitution by favoring one class of retailer of another.

The judge wasn’t buying that, rejecting claims by the group that the law is “arcane,” noting that there’s a line drawn by the legislature about what it will allow and it’s made a case for that line, so it’s not up to him to go all super-legislature to overturn it.

“Our members and Hoosiers are disappointed that the court did not rule to end an irrational, discriminatory and outdated law,” said IPCA Executive Director Scot Imus. “There is wide-support to modernize Indiana’s alcohol laws, and we will continue to fight for fairness in the marketplace.”

*Here’s your autoplaying introduction to Strong Bad, if you need it, and you’re welcome in advance. This is just one chance out of many I’ve offered and will continue to offer.

Judge rules no cold beer sales in grocery, convenience stores [TheIndyChannel.com]

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