If the richest person in the world walked up to me right now (Scrooge McDuck, he’s still in the lead, right?) and offered me my very own pool of money to swim in on the one condition that I stay at the Clown Motel overnight, well, my moneyswimming suit would stay firmly in its wrappings. Because if there’s one thing capable of turning even the most grown-up grown-up into a puddle of quivering, horrified mush, it’s clowns and the dark*.

As if an establishment filled to the brim with leering, smiling painted faces in every room isn’t enough to dissuade even the strongest of hearts, there are a few added scary bits at this Nevada motel, points out Roadtrippers.com. Which again, is chockfull of clowns, clowns, everywhere.

First of all — it’s basically in the middle of nowhere, a place for travelers to stop and try to find gas and maybe a place to sleep… not knowing the clown fate that awaits, unless they want to drive another 70 miles to the nearest town.

It’s also next to a cemetery filled with gold miners who died from a plague. So you just know their ghosts aren’t going to be happy — unless they too, are terrified of their clown neighbors and have decided to stay snug underground.

Of course, while some guests might have reported horrifying experiences involving clowns doing weird things to dinner hams (you’ll have to read the source link for that particular tale), if you’re actually a fan of clowns — and I salute you for having more guts than I do — this place could be a dreamland. OF NIGHTMARES.

*This post in no way constitutes a slur against the profession of clowning or those who make a living as clowns. I’m just a big wuss and It changed my life.

America’s scariest motel is haunted… by hundreds of clowns [RoadTrippers.com]

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