What’s a 76-year-old woman to do when Sears sends her a faulty lawnmower, schedules a time to pick it up and then doesn’t, and then refuses to refund her money until it gets around to taking back said mower, which will then be outside the 30-day-refund window? She marches in to have a strong word with store employees, who then call the cops.

The Akron Beacon Journal Online lays out the scenario, in which the woman’s mower didn’t work after three mows, and from then on, Sears’ customer service falls fantastically apart.

First, she called the store that sold her the mower, and the person who answers hangs up on her. So she drives into the city of Medina to a Sears there, and explains the problem for the bajillionth time.

In short — it stopped working three weeks ago, no one picked it up and never called about it. Sears employees pull the records to discover the delivery people gave her the wrong mower in the first place, and that they’d schedule another time to deliver the correct one and take the wrong one back.

But by then, she was sick of Sears and just wanted her money back. Too bad, said Sear you can’t have your money back until we get the bad mower back. And the kicker? Sears says it can’t come pick it up until a week from Wednesday, a time that is then outside the 30-day window for a refund.

That’s when three police officers arrive to “restore the peace.”

Says the Beacon Journal:

Did we mention that this 76-year-old grandmother stands 5-foot-2 and weighs 130 pounds?

Things get even more entertaining once the officers arrive.

A woman behind the counter, whom [the woman] describes as being north of 200 pounds, says to her, “Somebody your age better watch out or you’ll have a heart attack!”

The diminutive grandmother immediately shoots back, “You’ll have one before I do, Fatso!”

The police reports describes the situation as “irate customer being unruly.” We’d be unruly at that point, too.

Cops say three officers is a usual response to that kind of call, and that the woman was “shouting” and had caused one of the clerks to cry.

In the end, no one was charged with anything, and the woman had a handyman friend drop off the mower so she could get her refund. Then, she bought a John Deere.

*Thanks for the tip, Michael!

Bob Dyer: How many police officers does it take to calm grandmother? [Ohio.com]

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