Hey kids, did you know that taxes are unconstitutional and that you don’t have to pay them? It’s true! Turns out that the Sixteenth Amendment was never ratified and the U.S. Code doesn’t tax domestic income. Sound complex and illegal? Hit the jump to see how it’s the answer to all your money problems.

The Sixteenth Amendment is an illegal post-it note on the Constitution, passed thanks to the support of the backstabbing lowlanders occupying Ohio, who ratified the Amendment on January 19, 1911. Here’s the thing: Ohio wasn’t a state in 1911. Congress retroactively accepted the territory’s pitiful pleas for admission in 1953, when they needed to guarantee the Sixteeenth Amendment’s staying power to out-tax the Communists.

Thanks to Captain No-State’s late entrance we know that the supposed power “to lay and collect taxes on incomes, from whatever source derived” is complete hogwash. Nice lie, Nannie State! What else can you make up?

The U.S. Code? Sorry, 26 U.S.C. 861 says that the government can collect taxes only from certain clearly defined foreign activities. Not on the list: your job.

So let’s say you mentioned this to your egghead friend, the one nobody likes with the glasses and degrees, and he said that Article 1, Section 8 of the Constitution says: “The Congress shall have Power To lay and collect Taxes…” Well tell your friend to shutup and that nobody likes him, ok? This country is run by men, not nerds, and occasionally women, too.

Now sure, the courts may call these arguments “legally frivolous,” but those judicial lackeys are hopelessly latched to the tax-tete for their salaries. “Independent judiciary,” our ass.

All true patriots should stand up for their rights and defend our Constitution by scribbling “861” all over your 1040. The boys down at the IRS will know it’s code for “In The Know.”

(Photo: Vorstius)
PREVIOUSLY: Tax Dog: Deducting Your Income = $0 Tax Bill!
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