Ever wonder how Jesus and American Idol are different? Reader Jessica didn’t, even after she found a religious pamphlet on the subject in a Black & Decker food processor she picked up at Walmart. She is now “totally creeped out,” and doesn’t quite know how to respond.

She writes:

Dear Consumerist,

I purchased a Black & Decker food processor from my local Walmart store. When I opened the box for the first time, I found a religious pamphlet with the other paperwork (user’s manual, etc.). The pamphlet has an “American Idol” theme. I’m not sure if it was put there by Black & Decker or a Walmart employee or customer. The box was sealed with a strip of packing tape but I noticed when I removed it that the box is so glossy that the removal of the tape left no mark on it. Here are scans of the pamphlet. I hate these things. I’ve emailed Black & Decker and Walmart. Do you have any suggestions for me, aside from the action I’ve already taken? I’m totally creeped out.

Jessica

PS. Scans of the pamphlet are attached. Sorry the quality is so poor, not sure why.

Seems like the best way to get back is to take into your heart the belief that you will win American Idol. Share this belief with others.

Faith aside, if the food processor works then you can ask for an open-box discount, but not much more. If it only works for true believers, then bring it back and ask for a refund and a non-proselytizing appliance. We hear KitchenAids are fabulous and accepting.

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