Here's Your Half-Empty Glass

Ben is obviously a greedy loser. He asked for his drink with “no ice.” It seems that Bubba Gump Shrimp Co. has (correctly) identified a “no ice” drink order as a scam to get more juice than one deserves for $3.95. Don’t worry, folks. They’ve solved the problem. They served Ben a half empty glass. Ben is smart, but Bubba Gump’s “no ice” policy is smarter…From Ben’s blog:

Five minutes later, our waitress returns. The drink doesn’t have ice. But it’s literally half full. That’s correct. They took out the ice but didn’t full up the glass. And there was so much ice that I now have about half a glass of juice. For $3.95.

I asked where the rest of the juice was and she said they only left in as much as there would be with ice. I was so shocked I didn’t know what to say and she left. This was now an intense topic of conversation at our table. Did the waitress hate me? Was this some insane directive from Bubba Gump headquarters? Whatever it was, it feels actively hostile for a waitress to bring you a drink you ordered half full and tell you that’s all you’re getting.

So when she came back, I told her, as politely as I could, that I wasn’t going to pay $3.95 for half a glass of juice. She then informed that she wished she could fill it up, but it’s against their policy to give more than there would be with ice. First she said it was because the liquor costs so much. We told her there is no liquor in a mango spritzer, but she refused to budge. Eventually, she agreed to take the drink away and take it off my bill, because on principle I’m just not paying $4 for half a fucking glass of juice.

But the insanity’s not over. Oh no. Then she brings our food, as I’m happily drinking water. And she says “What can I bring you to drink to set things right?”

Before I could think about how insane this was, I blurted out “Can I have the drink I ordered?” But I could see on her face that this was a no-go. She’d rather bring me another drink… FOR FREE… then give me the drink I ordered… FOR $4. Rather than discuss this insanity, I ordered lemonade and moved on with my life.

This makes us laugh. Luckily, the solution is simple: Don’t eat at movie theme restaurants. —MEGHANN MARCO

(Photo: Emil Erlandsson)