In the wake of the Carmex controversy, we thought we’d offer some helpful lip-healing solutions. No, this isn’t a health blog, but it is about saving money and if we can get you off the chapstick and on the way to healthy lips—well, we’ve done our job. That being said, this may not work for you, and we’re not claiming to have any sort of special knowledge, you know, like doctors have. In fact, this is very probably quackery, and you shouldn’t even try it. Even though it works every single time for us.

Step 1: Exfoliate the lips. Wet them with very warm but comfortable water. You can find special lip exfoliator junk at the store or just do what we do, use a very fine pumice stone or a washcloth. Be very gentle. Very. Very. Very. Once your lips feel free of dry, dead skin, but before they start to hurt, stop.

Step 2: Apply Neosporin Cream. Not ointment. Cream. It’s different from the ointment. Don’t get it in your mouth, it’s not for internal use. This is best for the outside of your lips. Massage the cream in. Did we mention that you should not use the ointment. Use the cream. Don’t use tons of it. Just a little.

Step 3: Use Burt’s Bees on top of the massaged in Neosporin Cream. Experience the joy of healing lips.

This also works pretty well, minus the Burt’s Bees, if you have a blemish. Neosporin is great! It’s also a real drug, so don’t use it for more than a week, and for Pete’s sake— don’t swallow it.—MEGHANN MARCO

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