As airport security restrictions increasingly reach a Dr. Gonzo level of paranoid improbability, it’s tough to remember that airport security guards — the brave avatars of society’s paranoia — are the real heroes out there. Every day, they tirelessly confiscate such threats to national security as bottled water, baby pablum, medicated foot powder and tubes of Fixadent. Who knows how many lives they’ve saved so far?

Skeptics might claim that these security agents are doing nothing to make people safer, but are instead agents to make people more afraid. Posh! we cry. Surely, the fact that no nursing mother has yet succeeded in blowing up a blame with a bottle of baby formula says for itself that the system works. They have a 100% success rate!

But in case you’re on of those cynics, we point you to this delightful Flash game, in which you play an Airport Security guard who must fearlessly keep track of not only obvious threats, but the rapidly escalating list of security breaches like shirts, shoes and baseball caps. I think even the most skeptical bellyacher will have a new respect for our nation’s finest after playing a single round of this fine game.

Airport Security Game [Shockwave] (Thanks, Mark!)

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