Excessive Fluoride Turns Americans Into Commies

We’ve always known that the adding of fluoride to our water supply is an insidious Communist plot, hatched by the diabolical mind of Kruschev himself. Government officials fiercely denied it, but they would, shadow puppets of the Soviet regime and all. Those of us in the know did not have our fears assuaged by the Soviet Union’s supposed dissolution. After all, that is just what they wanted us to think.

Anyway, who’s laughing now? Brave Patriots within the National Academy of Sciences report that the fluoride levels in the drinking water of one in every fifteen hundred Americans actually leads to brittler bones and tooth disorders like enamel fluorosis, turning the beautiful smiles of thousands of Americans into the hideous, brown-toothed leers. Black teeth and contorted, inhuman physiques? Those pinkos were turning us into filthy Reds from the inside out!

“The bottom line from the nation’s top voice on science is that you can protect your children’s teeth by brushing them and you can protect their bones by getting rid of fluoride in tap water,” said Tim Kropp, the group’s senior scientist. Yes… and you can protect children from the lurking Communist menace by nuking Russia. All very sound advice.

Too much fluoride in water endangers bones [Yahoo News]