The words are almost too painful to write — I can’t help but think of that poor cheese — but Philadelphia’s so called “Swiss Cheese Pervert” has pleaded guilty to publicly defiling Swiss cheese. Or rather, he pleaded guilty to two counts of indecent exposure and four counts of harassment.

According to CBS Philadelphia, the 42-year-old was sentenced to eight years sex offender probation, and has to stay away from all four victims as well as go to a treatment program.

He could’ve received 25 years in prison, and was originally charged with Stalking, Indecent Exposure, Harassment and Open Lewdness for allegedly harassing four different women.

Three women say the man had driven by and then asked them to watch as he put Swiss cheese on his nether regions, offering them money to be the witness.

After he was arrested on charges for those incidents, another victim stepped up and claimed to have experienced a similar situation.

Rest easy, my cheese friends. Let’s hope this dose of justice keeps you all safe, secure for your fate in my refrigerator.

Philly’s So-Called ‘Swiss Cheese Pervert’ Pleads Guilty [CBS Philadelphia]

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