Lamp oil manufacturers have issued a new warning: don’t drink lamp oil. The TV says someone died recently after doing so. Not sure what the story is, but like other household products, it’s important to keep them in their proper containers. For instance, some colored lamp oils can look like cranberry juice. Here are some other poisons and the foods they can look like.
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Then what do I do with this wick sticking out of my ass?
I still love lamp.
Lampoil!
@linus: Lamp Oil == Gene Pool Chlorine?
@Angryrider: That wasn’t cheese or cleaning product. It was PedEgg shavings. Sorry you had to find out this way.
Whatever happened to putting poisonous stuff like lamp oil or Ronsonol in the old rectangular can?
I know, you’re a freaking dumbass if you drink something without first reading its label. However, these lampoil and cleaner companies are getting a little over-zealous with their marketing. They must think that if they put their product in a beverage type bottle that your thirst will entice you to buy it. A bit irresponsible if you ask me.
@MayorBee: Now THAT is disgusting (as well as hilarious).
Nobody at the store could understand why I thought this was incredibly bad product placement.
@Difdi: That’s scary. No one at all? Please tell me there were only a few employees in that day.
@EdnaLegume: I can’t decide whether or not you’re just being funny.
[en.wikipedia.org]
[en.wikipedia.org]
@mac-phisto: I remember those!
Seriously, the list freaks me out a bit:
Soap, Minute Maid Juice
Whose soap? Even liquid soap doesn’t have the consistency of water. Once you pour it how do you mistake the two? (Not to mention I’ve never seen a soap bottle look like a juice bottle.)
Comet Cleanser, Kraft Parmesan Cheese
That one just gives me bad images in my head.
As has been said before in comments, lamp oil is often used in fire breathing because of it’s low burning temperature and reluctance to ignite in liquid form (So you don’t light your face on fire so easily).
I’ve used it in fire breathing for years and I haven’t died yet, but I’ll tell ya, the stuff doesn’t ever taste good and gets much worse with age. I can’t imagine drinking it in any amount. Even the small amount that works it’s way down can make you burp up nasty fumes for hours. Anyone who drinks it in large quantities is looking to die or get cancer or something…
@no.no.notorious: It tastes like chicken too.
@grandzu: No wonder my lamp won’t light… Smells delicious, tho.
i wonder if the introduction of blue raspberry lead to a lot of windex related deaths.
Orange Fabuloso. It’s a floor cleaner that looks and smells so much like juice it’s hard to resist.
This was probably some newbie trying to do fire breathing and failed. Also: since when is lamp oil red?
When I was younger I always got these confused:
# Diet Pepsi, Pabst Blue Ribbon Beer
# Genesee Cream Ale, Seven Up
Poison control helps keep your kids out’a the liquor cabinet.
For fire breathers out there; I’ve seen a demo video on a how-to website that advises using corn starch for breathing fire (think: almost empty grain silos exploding…). That seems like it would be a MUCH safer way to breathe fire than both lamp oil and everclear. It’s only flammable after it leaves the mouth…
@Smitty Werbenjagermanjensen: you’re more right than you know. supposedly, a study found that youngsters were actually drawn to skull & bones, but most were repelled by mr. yuk.
& for a more elaborate history, visit [chp.edu]
(you can even listen to the “mr yuk theme song”)
They shouldn’t put labels on things like this. Common sense should tell you not to drink it as it is lamp oil and FLAMMABLE.
But can I eat the floaty stuff from a lava lamp? It always looks so tempting…
And: never use lamp oil in your bong. Ever!
How do you drink/eat stuff that smells and tastes bad? Urine looks like lemonade, but I think it would be hard to get someone to drink it.
@Ben Popken:
But… (s)he’s right. Much like the “do not lift this over your head to trim the hedges” warnings on lawnmowers, we have entirely too many warning labels on products today.
It really is no wonder that we’ve lost all sight of ‘personal responsibility’ in this country.
I’m all for a “Toxic”/”Poison” label on items that are toxic, but it should not then be necessary to inform people that you aren’t supposed to drink/eat/inject toxic/poisonous products.
This is precisely WHY the Darwin Awards were created. The human race would NEVER have reached its current level of technological advancement without natural selection. We’re dumbing down humanity by expending such a large amount of effort protecting those without common (any?) sense from themselves.
This is just one more reason we should go back to using hemp oil in our lamps.
I’m all for a “Toxic”/”Poison” label on items that are toxic, but it should not then be necessary to inform people that you aren’t supposed to drink/eat/inject toxic/poisonous products.
I’m not clear on your complaint. It should not be necessary to inform people that you are not supposed to drink/eat them, and to do so intentionally is pretty stupid. But that’s not the same thing as saying, hey, maybe manufacturers shouldn’t be putting such substances in bottles that can be easily mistaken for food products (and these cases very often involve small children just looking for juice).
This is precisely WHY the Darwin Awards were created.
You do realize that the Darwin Awards are mostly a woman with a website and books, and some unrelated (often half-fictitious) emails, and not an actual panel of people, right?
@camille_javal:
Yes, but hopefully their ubiquitous nature has at least done SOME good.
As far as my complaint… there are only so many efficient ways to package items. Companies spend millions of dollars making their products stand out when placed next to products from competitors. It should be up to the consumer to intelligently handle safety concerns with (legal) toxic materials.
“Small children looking for juice” is a key point – that’s why billions are made from the sale of “child-proofing” products like cupboard and drawer locks/ties, outlet covers, etc.
I’m not saying that the consumer holds 100% of the blame in 100% of cases – I’ve come close to slicing holes in my hands when opening pop-top tins and “anti-theft” plastic packages – but we’re teaching consumers to intentionally act stupid because, hey, you probably won’t die, and you can get tons of money by suing the company that made the product!*
*Full disclosure: I really, really, really want someone to sue over those stupid plastic packages, only because I want them to go away. Thieves just bring a razorblade, while I have to dull a good pair of scissors on the crappy plastic for ten minutes!