God Visits The Payless Shoe Source

Attention religious people: God has set foot among us in the form of a guy who wants free shoes and slippers from a Payless Shoe Source in Northwest Indiana.

For those of you playing along at home, this is the second man from Gary, Indiana that we have written about after he invoked the name of our Lord at a retail location.

What is going on in Gary, Indiana? From the NWI Times:

Police filed two counts of attempted robbery, two counts of criminal confinement and intimidation charges against Richard Brewer Jr., Detective Jeff Rice said.

Brewer, 50, entered the store on Broadway about 1 p.m. Thursday, and asked two employees for socks and slippers. The employees gave Brewer the socks he was looking for, Rice said, and told him they didn’t have the slippers.

Rice said Brewer then moved closer to the employees and told them he was God.

“He said ‘When God speaks to you you’re supposed to give him everything,'” Rice said.

The employees realized Brewer was attempting to rob the business, Rice said, and Brewer also told the employees since he is God and visiting them, they would die soon.

That’s just scary. —MEGHANN MARCO

‘God’ gets arrested, doesn’t get slippers [NWI Times]
(Photo:crschmidt)

PREVIOUSLY: Sorry, Chase Does Not Accept $50,000 Checks From God

Comments

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  1. Wormfather says:

    Is it ok to laugh? @#$% it, I’m laughing anyway.

  2. castlecraver says:

    You’d think after all this God would stick to just appearing in trees, windows, and ceilings instead of trying to engage in sketchy sales transactions.

  3. jeffj-nj says:

    A friend of mine works at a mental institution. She has met several Jesuses.

    True story.

  4. enm4r says:

    Hopefully I’m not the only person who started laughing thinking about the song “What if God was one of us…”

  5. jamesdenver says:

    I felt like Moses crossing the Red Sea when I visited the aisle of this Payless:

    [www.futuregringo.com]

  6. MarcAnthony says:

    Wow!
    I live in Gary, Indiana! I could have meet GOD! Wonder what I was doing that day! GOD WAS IN THE SAME CITY AS ME…..Coolness!!!!!


    *and I was embarrassed to say i’m from Gary!*
    NOT ANYMORE!

  7. Namilia says:

    Just another nutjub for the looney bin! Maybe he can bunk up with all the other guys who have changed their name to God before commiting crimes :D

  8. Youthier says:

    If God vacations in Gary, there’s no way I want to go to heaven.

  9. Havok154 says:

    Hmmm…I would of guessed burkenstocks, but I guess slippers are more to god’s liking.

  10. MeOhMy says:

    This is a good time for me to point out how much I despise Payless’s “BOGO” sales. BOGO is supposed to be short Buy One, Get One Free. They use BOGO to mean Buy One, Get One Half-Price.

    Yes, you “Bought One” and “Got One,” but there has to be standards, otherwise you can have a BOGO event where you can “Buy One” at full price and “Get One” at full price.

    This isn’t ‘Nam. We have rules here.

  11. I can see the new Payless ads now:
    Voiceover: “And God said… you must go to Payless!”
    Hallelujah corus, bright lights. Camera pans up from a pair of scuffy Nike’s to the crazy God-person wearing them. He gives the camera a thumbs up.
    God-boy: “Ah gets my free shiz from Payless!”

  12. InductGnosis says:

    Thats some good stuff!!

  13. Buckler says:

    Sorry, Dragontologist; pet-peeve time. Cameras can’t “pan up”, because panning is a horizontal motion, as in “panorama”. Cameras tilt up.

    No worries. I catch newscasters saying this all the time, and it bugs the hell out of me.

    Anyway, the first thing I thought of was James T. Kirk…”Um, excuse me…excuse me! what would God need with a pair of slippers?”

    Meh.

  14. lattehiatus says:

    Reminds me of that episode of Married with Children where Al suffers head trauma and claims to see God’s shoes. They were golden slippers with socks sewn in.

  15. Dustbunny says:

    @Havok154:

    I see Birkenstocks as being more of a Jesus thing, so, yeah, I can picture God going for the slippers.

  16. erica.blog says:

    Like a scene from Life of Brian… we’re splitting into the “Slipper! No, Birkenstocks! No, Sandals!” camps…

    I’d hate to be the employee stuck being the hostage of the crazy man, though.

  17. arachnophilia says:

    well, it’s a sad day when GOD gets arrested.

  18. hop says:

    he any relation to the talking wall in the termite commerecials?????

  19. Starfury says:

    Best line from Star Trek V (horrid movie):

    Why does God need a starship?

  20. andrewsmash says:

    “I am God – give me shoes!”

    “Do you two pieces of ID?”