i’m so scared

Listen, I know your kid is an absolute angel, a downright sweetie. See that blond boy screaming his head off like the world is ending and he’s sitting on the lap of the man responsible for the apocalypse? That’s Reid,* and I know as a matter of fact that he is an adorable child when not sitting on Santa Claus’ lap at a Minnesota mall. But get the Big Man involved and plenty of your children (or you, in your diapered years) will turn into red-faced banshees with one goal in mind: “Get. Me. Off. This. Guy’s. Lap.” [More]