Dear Corporate Executives — please learn how to write. Having initially been a greasy, protoplasmic ooze poured into the mold of a stiff, starched suit, then imbued — Golem-like — with the spark of meaningless corporate business speak, you soulless automatons never seem to realize how meaningless phrases like “maximize initiatives” and “establish paradigm, COB” are to those of us who sprang forth from human loins.
