How important is the element of surprise? Do you want to be surprised when you receive a gift? When people are about to throw a surprise party for you? What about when you accidentally learn that your boyfriend is about to propose…thanks to a stray piece of junk mail?

That’s what happened to S. and her now-fiancé. Did the store mess up by not respecting their customer’s wishes, or is S. overreacting?

Many, many months ago I picked out my perfect engagement setting from [a regional jewelry chain.] I had the sales person write down all of the information and I passed the card on to my then boyfriend. (We both knew the engagement was coming after 5+ years together and he wanted me to be able to pick out my ring). The surprise was going to come in the timing- I had no idea when he was going to get the ring or propose.

Fast forward a few months and I’m checking our joint mailbox at the apartment. A thick, heavy envelope addressed to my boyfriend from [the store] sat glaring back at me. I went upstairs and handed to him, but we both knew the surprise was ruined.

When he purchased the ring he specifically asked and WROTE DOWN that he didn’t want any mail going to our apartment. I’m the only one with a mail key and this was exactly what he didn’t want to happen. What did they send him? A solicitation to sign up for some sort of membership card.

Imagine spending THOUSANDS of dollars on a surprise and having the store ruin it. This was supposed to be one of the best moments of our lives (especially after being together for so long) and [the store] didn’t even care.

He called them and they didn’t offer to fix it. They didn’t do anything.

I sent an e-mail to their corporate customer service contact, but obviously never heard anything back.

S. adds that on a trip back to the store to resize the ring, she brought up the mail issue and store staff simply told the couple that they should have requested that no mail be sent to their home. Thanks, but they already thought of that.

Is it unreasonable to assume that couples about to get engaged might live together, and to be a little more discreet about sending junk mail? Why doesn’t the couple’s apartment complex give out two mailbox keys? Did they lose the other one? Was there a clerical mistake, or did the store ignore the customer’s wishes altogether?

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