GUY: Hey how about a movie tonight?
GIRL: Wow, what’s that aftershave?!
ANNOUNCER: New Hai Karate aftershave is so powerful, it drives women right out of their minds. That’s why we have to put instructions on self-defense in every package. Hai Karate, the brisk splash-on aftershave the smooths, and sooths, and cools. Hai Karate, aftershave, cologne, and gift sets. Hai Karate, be careful how you use it.
GIRL: Hmm, mmm. Check
ANNOUNCER: Oh dear, time for a little gamesmanship. With new Hai Karate Gamesman.
GUY: Your move.
ANNOUNCER: New Gamesman from Hai Karate. For the man who plays to win.
JOEY BISHOP: I would like to talk to you men about this new aftershave lotion, Hai Karate. Just in case you got some now or you get some for Christmas…
REGIS PHILBIN: Wait wait wait, never use Hai Karate without first reading the instructions! They come in every package! You know why it’s important….
JOEY: Ah, it’s a commercial, you know they’re kidding, right?
REGIS: Nonononono! It’s true! Because you see with just a little too much cologne, a girl, even your wife, can become crazy! And attack you passionately! (Giggles).
JOEY: Lay some on me!
REGIS: A little over there…
JOEY: All right, we don’t need that much.
Catcalls from the audience.
JOEY: Ha! Ho! Ha! Help me out! Help me out!
REGIS: Ha! Ha! Ha!
JOEY: That was a commercial, and now this is, without any solicitation at all, young lady, would you mind coming up for just a moment? Now really, we do commercials, and we’re gently unfair, because we don’t become familiar with the product. Now would you mind? I have a little dab of Hai Karate on me. And I want to get an unsolicited opinion. All right? Ok. Now just give it a little whiff. Is that nice?
GIRL: It’s delicious.
JOEY: Is it? Ha! Haaaaaaaaa!
If you’d like to nominate a commercial for our weekly series “Great Moments In Commercial History” send us an email at tips [at] consumerist [dot] com. Be sure to put “Great Moments In Commercial History” in the subject. To see other commercials that have been featured in the series, click here.