The FBI has released an unverified tip that those people who “hate freedom” are planning on attacking shopping malls in LA and Chicago this season. Before you buy more duct tape, the FBI emphasized that “there is no information to state this is a credible threat”—but they felt they needed to share it “out of an abundance of caution.”
This is this writer’s first ever scare-orrist post! I was starting to think that the era of crazy death warnings from The Enemy were behind us, and here I was with a blog platform to help spread the fear. But now my job here is done.