TSA Arrests Penis Pump Terrorist

There’s simply nothing more awkward than being caught with a penis pump. By your Mom. On vacation. While the TSA accuses you of being a terrorist.

Mardin Azad Amin’s black, industrial model penis pump was discovered y security personnel during a baggage check. Since it resembled a grenade, he was asked what it was. Amin then decided to say it was a bomb, as his elderly mother was standing nearby, just waiting to pounce upon him and tell him he’d go blind.

The true great thing about this story is it really does perfectly stress the age old dilemma: would you rather your mother think you were a murderer than a masturbator? Or a self-inflater, in this case.

Is that a grenade in your pocket? {Chicago Sun Times]


Edit Your Comment

  1. homerjay says:

    This guy couldn’t go a week without pumping his dick? What did he expect would happen???

  2. I’m telling you it’s not my bag baby!

  3. Kornkob says:

    Where’s the consumer angle here? As I see it, the TSA did the right thing: arrested the guy who said he had a bomb.

    I can see the humor in the story, but don’t see any consumer issues.

  4. mactbone says:

    The consumer issue is to warn people that lots of things look like bombs and they may want to make sure that their Giant Fist doesn’t show up on X-Ray if they’re going to be embarrased by it.

  5. Chris says:

    What are you, the genre police?

  6. The Unicorn says:

    *Thom Yorke voice* Gennnnre Po-lice…

  7. Morgan says:

    This isn’t the first time something that isn’t directly related to consumer issues has been posted just because it’s funny. I hope it isn’t the last, because, honestly, would you want to have missed reading this?

  8. creamsissle says:

    Looks like his plan to maintain discretion worked beautifully.

    Crayonshinobi–awesome reference to Austin Powers.

  9. AcidReign says:

    …..I got my luggage “checked” by U.S. customs in Mobile this morning. They opened 2 of our seven bags, looked at the top, and did absolutely no rooting around and dumping. Those guys do just enough to say that they worked, and nothing else. I could have had a bale of Mexican weed in there, and they wouldn’t have found it!