• Showtime channel for free this weekend on most basic cable. They’re showing Crash this weekend. Pour one out for Broke Back Mountain while watching.
• Bobsandler, insurance company humorist, is getting the royal 404.
• Diebold, a real hanging Chad, tries to impose $40,000 fine for election official who had the gall to inspect their machines.
• Snakes on a Plane, featuring Samuel L. Jackson, first movie developed by crackhead internet users. Hooray for the vox populare, putting the power to make crappy movies into the people’s hands.
• The Lawnmower Man who Said No to Walmart.
• Death by a thousand PIN pricks.
• HOWTO: Use Copernican astronomy to calculate how long you’ll have to be on hold. By the time you finish, you’ll have a rep on the line.
• No Coast blog finds a purple ribbon and ties it around The Consumerist’s shame.

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